The creation of the moment
by greenfairy13
Summary: The Doctor gets a note and picks up Clara to investigate. In the meantime Rose and her human Doctor enjoy their last evening of normal life before both are being changed back to what they really are: a Time Lord and a Wolf. First try on a story and english is not my mother tongue so any feedback is highly appreciated! Set after the Time of the Doctor
1. Changes

The message was short. Tt simply said "help me" and gave a few coordinates. No hint who sent it. Not that many people in the universe would be capable of sending him a message but that was the point. The fact that only really special individuals could reach him triggered his curiosity and he called Clara at her school. He left the address and waited for the roar of her motorcycle.

The house was set on the countryside somewhere between the green Scottish hills. It was a castle of the Victorian age, huge and massive. The inside richly decorated with the finest and luxurious furniture of that long gone period. The house was way to big for it's only two inhabitants but as they could easily afford it they never gave a second thought on that fact.

The couple was now married for thirteen years and the marriage was still a happy one. Both worked for a governmental organisation in a special division known as Torchwood.

Their task was to investigate in any case that could be related to extraterrestrial visits. He, John Tyler was a brilliant scientist, she, Rose Tyler a field agent.

Whenever she went to investigate he would insist to join her. Not so much for the thrill but because he liked to keep her safe. Thrill was no longer what he expected from life, he had had his time and enough adventures for more than just one life and though he would have never thought he would ever get to that point he just loved silence and furniture.

He had decorated and restored the house himself, he had picked all of the curtains and the carpets and restored the old closets, he had spent hours to renovate the big oak wooden doors and he had loved it, it had made him happy and quiet. In former times he used to mock on people decorating their homes and he had been terrified on the imagination of picking out carpets, but now? He had started to collect them, he liked the feeling of a fluffy carpet under his bare feet and he liked looking at the various patterns and colours. She sad he had become domestic and he said nothing in return because it was the truth.

The night that turned his life back again was not special. It was a cold winter night, the hills around their home where covered with thin ice, together with the moonlight it looked bright and gorgeous.

She was lying in their huge bed, covered only with a thin blue silk blanket. She was still beautiful with her long blond hair, her big red mouth the shining huge brown eyes. Just like him she was covered with sweat and breathing heavily. He needed to catch breath so he turned to the window and opened it a bit to feel the icy air on his naked skin. He had an awkward feeling as he looked at the hills. As if the ice was staring at him, watching him. He tried to recognise anything that would rationalise that sense but he didn't succeed.

"Do you miss it?" she asked him. "I mean...you had the ability to reach for the stars, the whole universe was wide open to you but instead you stayed with me." Her voice was soft, only a hush and he could sense that she feared the answer. "All that beauty you will now never discover again, I feel so guilty sometimes, as if had betrayed you and robbed your chances."

He was still feeling that something wasn't right outside but he turned to look at her. "You are worth a billion universes, I have seen so much and done so much but I will never regret that I had given it up. I have been travelling for so long but I have never found anything more beautiful, more valuable than you. Any traveller has a destination, I did not, but now I am at home. With you. And I wouldn't trade that for the universe or any universe."

He closed the window softly and crawled under the blanket to her. He padded his head on her chest and listened to her heartbeat. "I am perfectly happy-I really am." Her hand reached out for him and he could feel how she calmed down and started falling asleep while he still was a bit nervous. But he had in the meantime forgotten what had caused that feeling. Maybe he should have a little midnight snack? Though he was incredibly thin he loved to eat. In his fifties he would probably not be skinny any more but as long as he could allow himself to let got and eat whenever he felt like doing so he would keep on.

"Honey? Did you do shopping today? We still got a jar of apples in sugar with cinnamon flavour?" "You ate them all up...brought 4 jars...but there are two more hidden behind the orange jam." "See-that's why you are the perfect wifey." He gave her a big smile that covered his whole face and even his big always nice looking eyes lightened up when he got up and headed for the kitchen. "Would you make me a cuppa hot chocolate?"she asked before he reached the door. These where the last words he would ever hear from his human wife.

The oak wood exploded and a big splinter hit his head hard and he went to the ground, unconscious-k.o. in the first round. She was too terrified to scream and it also would have been perfectly useless.

Three men entered the room, all covered in dark red gowns.

"We have finally found her. The girl that can control the time vortex!"

"No doubt it's really her?"

The man on the left scanned the unconscious man next to the door.

"It's the Doctor-in his human form." He declared, the word "human" was spoken with great despise.

Rose got up an reached for her night gown to cover her nakedness. "Who the hell are you? What do you want? Wait-I don't care just get out of my house!" She wasn't afraid, she was infuriated, she tried to get past the men to see after her husband but the man in the middle raised his hand and sent an energy wave that knocked her to the ground.

"My name is of no importance but you are Rose Tyler, you can control the Time Vortex and we will use this ability."

"What if she is no longer connected?" asked the man on the right, "She would just die than?" "She'll die any ways"he replied and tied her up with a black chain. The material of the chain was black and it had no shine, hard as metal and ice cold but it could be wrapped around her like a rope. He tied up her wrists and feet and connected the other half to a wooden box.

The most ordinary box you could imagine, it looked like one that could be found on a market to keep potatoes in it. "See-that's a rope made from a dying star, this material exists only for a moment before the star turns into a black hole. Many of my people have died to collect it. Just for you, you special little human." He smiled but it looked completely mad, totally insane.

"Who are you?" Rose screamed now. "Doctor wake up-help me!" "You know the language I'm speaking to you right now is french, you don't speak french, do you? But you are still connected to the Tardis, still connected to the Time Vortex, only if I'd speak Gallifreyan you wouldn't get a bit. I'm a Time Lord and you will be the salvation of our race-just a tiny sacrifice so you will once rescue us all. Your useless human form will be turned into something great-unfortunately I'll have to enslave you."

The Doctor got up, blood tripped from his forehad, Rose looked at him, eyes wide open in horror as the Timelord stabbed right into her heart.

The room exploded from white light. The three Timelords where thrown to the wall. The light dimmed and got golden. Rose's eyes where glowing and she tried to get up but her chains wouldn't let her.

"Doctor!" She tried to reach out for him.

He stumbled over the floor to her.

"Doctor, my body is dying. Every atom in me is burning, the Vortex is still part of me but these chains will stay even when I'm dead. My mind...it is flooding into the Vortex, connecting me with it but these chains will fix me to this box...he will control Time itself through me if you don't help."

"What do I have to do?"

"Take my heart-quick before it burns. My DNA is the key to control my mind and my heart will connect you with the Vortex, two hearts, it will turn you back into a Timelord. Take it now! Don't think, do it, before he does."

The men behind where starting to pull their selves together, coming closer. Rose's body was glowing. Burning up from the energy of the Vortex. Her chest opened like a box and he could see her heart.

It was red, beating but turned to something else. It looked like a ruby and it was hard and hot. He burned his hand as he grabbed it and pushed it into his chest. The pain he felt was enormous. Every inch of his body was burning and he immediately throw up but he was so strong now, his mind broadened he could feel again how earth was falling through time and space.

And the Doctor started running.

**Please leave a review!**


	2. Burning down

The Doctor rushed down the stairway. His two hearts beating strong and fast. There was no feeling of excitement or luck though he had not been filled with energy like this in a long time. He could feel his skin at the back being burnt as the Timelords sent out another blast of energy. He ran across the hallway and turned left to the library. He ripped out a blue book, tossed it on the floor and entered a code, a twenty inch thick concrete-steal wall opened. As he was inside he pushed the emergency button and locked himself up. These doors where sonic-device safe. It would keep the Timelords outside, not forever of course but he estimated he would have about ten minutes, fifteen if he would be lucky.

He breathed in, it was so incredibly strange: one moment you are in bed with your wife, an ordinary human enjoying the weekend and the next moment you are turned immortal again running from Timelords and your wife is...no.

He did not wanted to finish the thought, not now. It was freezing cold in the room, he noticed that he was still completely naked, fortunately a black shirt and jeans lay on the chair. As he pulled the shirt over his head he could feel how the scratches on his back healed. Rose had caused them undeliberately just twenty minutes ago when they had been in bed. The old scar on his hand healed as well. The scar had been at the back of his hand for seven years now, since he and Rose had had an inconvenient encounter with an unfriendly alien race that tried to steal all water from earth. It had been Rose who had cleaned the wound back then and wrapped up his hand. She had been crying and she had been mad from fear that she could lose him. All faded now...

He stared at his desk and then at the closet in the back corner. Inside he and Rose kept any kind of weapon they had ever found during their missions for Torchwood but which had been too dangerous to be used by humans. No guns-the Doctor never uses guns. Up to now he never had used guns. But anyone can change his mind. He hesitated and then he modified a laser gun with his sonic screwdriver so it would only freeze his opponents, the promise he once made was still vivid, he would not break it from anger, he would not disappoint his Rose.

The concrete-steal doors opened and he stepped outside. The library was a mess, the oak wood staircase was burning, he could smell it, if the fire would reach the silk curtains the house would be lost.

Three fast shoots and the Timelords stood still. They where frozen on place next to each other one right in front the concrete-steal door which he had tried to open. The Doctor tied them up quickly having only seconds until they would be able to move again. He looked around the library but the wooden box in which Rose's mind was trapped was not there. He turned towards the stairs and tried to get on the first floor, back to the bedroom but the fire wouldn't let him. The stairs shriecked and cracked under his steps, the fire burnt the hairs on his arms, he could not breathe and suddenly he fell. The stairs cracked once more and he landed hard on the table in the hallway. The fire reached the curtains and now it was certain that his house was lost.

The first Timelord could move again and yelled "she is not there any more!" So he turned back to library. The pain faded as his wounds started healing. A good thing about being a Timelord he thought grimly.

"So my house is burning down, my wife is dead-I suppose we have only short time. Start explaining! Start now or I will go and leave you here tied like a Christmas parcel."

The leader of the little group raised his voice: "We are sorry, Doctor. But what we did had to be done. It was necessary and important to get your human. She is the key to the salvation of Gallifrey, of the whole universe. Her mind is strong enough to control the Vortex. The Time War is coming and her mind will bring us victory, she can change time itself and defeat the Daleks. We saw the future, the prophecy was clear, we had to find her and turn her into the Moment. She will be able to change future and past in a second in any way we want her to. The chains will hold her and she will have to obey!"

"But I have her heart, my new second heart that connects me with the Vortex and makes me a Timelord and also controls her as you just pointed out. You need me, so where is she now! And you are really wrong, I have no clue how you three made it here but the Moment will burn Gallifrey and Skaro alike. It will end the Time War but it's not your salvation but the downfall of Gallifrey! And this is not a prophecy-it's history, it was my hand on the button that sent you all to your hell before the Universe would have been destroyed!

"You are wrong Doctor, so wrong. Seek your memory, tell us what you find! Gallifrey will last as long as time lasts. We broke the law, we travelled into our own future. We are timelocked but alive and it was the moment that saved us. There is only one mind that can control the Vortex, your wife is the one, the Master had told us everything about her after his return! Your other version and he have recently met and we learned that a human version of you and the human woman would be in a parallel world."

"But the walls have been sealed!"

"Not any more - we did escape our prison in time. We changed the past and the future. We have broken any law concerning time to get here and we will not be stopped. We pity your wife's death but it's such a small price in order to safe us all!"

"Perfect-but the flames are coming and you still have not answered my question: where is Rose?!"

"We sent her back in Time, to another universe, a different time. You can control her,true. But you can also free her while any version of you will be able to control her. Just think about the possiblities! What could that unleashed time goddess do? You will never find her but another Doctor will and as it's your task to save and protect you will just do as always and never know what or who the Moment exactly was."

The Doctor scanned the room but there was no hint where they had sent the box, he searched the pockets of the Timelords and found a little burnt out black star.

"You created a black mini hole and just dropped her through?! That's insane."

"No, it is brilliant, the box is a special creation, it sends a signal to Gallifrey, they will find it. Just right now the box is somewhere and sometime and the star rips a hole in the walls of the universes. She is back in our universe beyond your reach."

The Timelord gave an insane and unhealthy laugh: "She is lost but billions are safe-it's exactly what you do all the Time, what you already did. You believe you have burnt Gallifrey, sacrificed billions and you are really mad about us because we took her? You are such a hypocrite!"

The Doctor stared at the flames, fingers running through his hear and suddenly he felt it, felt how his memory slightly changed:

The day he had always wanted to forget, the day of the Doctor.

He heard her voice: "The moment is coming"

"I am ready"

"If you do this, you are going to live. Than that's your punishment."

But Rose would have never let him kill all these people and suddenly it was so clear. How could he have ever had forget? Any incarnation of himself had been there-flying their Tardisses in order to save Gallifrey and lock it up from Time and Space. Anyone safe but Gallifrey ripped out of the universe.

He untied the three men and they disappeared in a second thanks to a teleport.

He ran back into his bunker. At the end of the room was a safe and inside a small piece of a Tardis coral.

As the fire went out he made his way to his bedroom. Rose's body was burnt to ashes. Thank God he did not have to see corpse.

He searched through the dirt until he found her wedding ring- a simple gold ring with their names engraved in Gallifreyan, the only piece in any universe that gave away his real identity. He pulled the ring on over his little finger.

Gallifrey is safe, I should be happy, he thought. But he was not. He was full of anger and pain. He had finally found a home, had stopped running and now it was all burnt. He had been running for centuries and when he had finally found what he always had wished for, what anyone wishes: A home.

Every journey has an end and he had finally found it. Now his house was almost nothing but ashes and he was again an ageless god condemned to walk in eternity. To hell with Gallifrey, to hell with the Timelords. His family had once been erased, ages ago when he was still young; only his granddaughter Susan had been left to him until he had to leave her as well.

He considered his promise: never cruel or cowardly, never give up, never give in. None of his enemies would ever stick to these words but they where happy, they had still their homes and lives, their children and wifes and those three Timelords were on their way back home. Safe and sound. Being a good man is not rewarded in any way. He sighed and considered if he would break his promise.


	3. Paper chase

Clara got off her bicycle and looked around the Tardis and teased the Doctor: "So I hope this will be fun this time-had enough crying with you recently." "Oh don't be rude,we always have our fun, look here somebody sent us a message." "Help me...does not sound like fun, more like drama..." "Ah you never know! What do you think?" "Well-who can send you a message? You don't exactly hand your number to anyone, we should maybe make a list or something." "Well-we could certainly do that or just go looking,find that place, that time and see what's waiting there! I never liked lists, make a list, read the manual, make sure you follow the safety instructions-it's worse than death and drop dead boring!" "Hmm... might be, but we could also just run straight into a trap." "Oh yes-fun ahead, we're coming!"

The Doctor started the Tardis. "Doctor I still want to know, who is able to send you messages?" "Well...there would be you, you called me, remember?By the way how did you do that? That phone of mine it isn't a real phone? How could your ring it? You didn't even called the mobile which also would have been interesting." "Can't you ever answer a question?" "Oh you talk-I've asked you before, you never answered!" "I've told you before, a girl in the shop, where I bought my computer that later uploaded my mind to the internet, gave me that specific number and said it would be the greatest helpline in the universe, I don't think that she ever thought she would be that right. I did not meet her again, but she was just an ordinary shop clerk, not some alien in disguise. It must have been random, just some strange coincidence or a gamma stroke that would lead my call to you because the world would need you...no idea. So who is now really on your list? Who can call the great,mysterious Doctor?"

"And exit! We have reached our destination." The Doctor stared at the monitors of his Tardis, he saw nothing but nothingness. They where surrounded by a black universe, no stars, no planets, everything pitch black. He moved the angle of the telescope from left to right and suddenly there was something. He and Clara looked at the monitors: a great black hole was floating in front their eyes. Clara chocked: "That does not seem good,does it? Are we too late Doctor? " The Doctor stared silently at the hole. "I have been here before, I can remember now." "Doctor, are we safe, what is this, where are we?" "We have reached a dead black hole, it was called the Satan Pit. It's purpose was to engulf everything that came to close, it orbited around a planet that would not fall into until the beast would be set free. This had been a prison but the beast is gone, the black hole is dead, it has no purpose. We are at the end of our universe. The last border." "But why are we here? Here is nothing, this place...it is terrifying, Doctor I'm scared. " Clara had never before admitted that way to be afraid, here eyes were wide from anxiety.

The Doctor was stumped. The time was right, the coordinates fitted but what was he supposed to do here? Nothing could be done at such a place.

"Doctor! There is something outside!" Something knocked at the doors, at the walls, it bumpered outside. The Doctor waited, one knock, two knocks,three...oh he would never again allow four knocks...and ripped the door open. A piece of wood floated over. He reached out to grab it. The wood was burnt, black and of terrible smell, the only thing that could be deciphered was the letter "B". The Doctor shook his head. He tested the wood, tried to figure out the type of wood, the chemicals it had been treated with, an our later he looked truly astonished:"But that is impossible! This wood,it is not wood-not really,it is...oh Clara it's wonderful! It's the same material as the Tardis is made of. It's a hint, a hint to find Gallifrey!"

"But Doctor-it's burnt, it smells terrible,something is wrong with this thing." "Oh it's a start, we have to move on!" "So where are we going?" "Of course were this came from-it gives me any hints I need, some chemicals on that piece are really specific, I know were we start. Clara,my Clara, I'm going home!"


	4. What the Doctor lost

The Doctor locked at the Tardis coral in his hand and thought back at the day he had received it. His other self had given him the coral and Meta-Donna had explained how the growth could be accelerated. Donna...what about her? He wondered what she would be doing right now and how she had coped with being a Meta Crisis, 'cause he certainly had trouble at the beginning and if he hadn't found a way to stabilise his DNA in time his life with Rose would have ended in 48 hours or even less.

Thirteen years ago he and Rose were standing at Bad Wolf Bay and he remembered his first day of his human life:

The Tardis just had taken off and he was scared, really scared because it was nothing but certain she would accept him, understand that he in fact was actually just another form of regeneration and not another person. Still himself, the real Doctor and not a copy; except that he now was what he at the bottom of his heart wanted to be - a human. While the Family of Blood had been chasing him through the entire universe he had turned himself into a human and the decision of becoming the wanderer in time again had not been easy. It was that great guilt that had kept him running for centuries, which would not let him stop. It had been guilt that had convinced his other self to abandon Rose with him. He could best tell how painful this decision must have been to him.

"You...uhm...you are him?" Rose asked. "I am me, the Doctor-only difference is the human heart, all my memories, my mind, everything that really counts is doctorish- remind me never use that word again- but yes; I am the Doctor but this time I have a chance"

"Chance for what exactly?" "A chance to become what I was, to be with someone I love. I chance to be not alone. I've told you once:what you really need when you're travelling through space and time is a hand to hold. More specifically: I want to hold YOUR hand. You're fine with that?" Rose took the hand he waved softly in the air. "The hand that had been cut off- you remember that day, don't you? You hesitated to take it...same old hand, same old me!" he showed this wonderful bright big smile Rose so truly adored about him. He had so many ways to smile, this was the one with wich he could hide his insecurity, when he just wasn't sure what would happen next-a bit concerned and it proofed her. "It's really you" "Been telling you all the time" She took his hand, then his arm and leaned against him. He put his face down her shoulder. Together they where just standing there, watching the waves, hearing the sound of the birds, feeling the soft sea breeze.

It maybe had been the first time in the last months or even years the Doctor and Rose had stopped running. On her journey through the cracks of the universes she had seen such wonders and such horrific things but her target had always been to find and save him. Later on she told him, that on that day she awkwardly felt like the winner of a game show, after having fought yourself from level to level and finally there was the big prize. Except he wasn't a prize. He was a human now and her Doctor. In a strange way, she immediately fully accepted the fact that he really was the Doctor, not a copy or a clone but really her Doctor. He squeezed her hand softly and she looked at his face. She had missed him so much and now she was almost afraid to look at him, as if he would vanish and melt into the ocean if she looked to long. After all that happened could it really be that simple? A sundown at a beach they had once only connected with loss and pain? Suddenly he embraced her and gave her a long, intense kiss. She hold onto him and tears where streaming uncontrolled from her eyes. He felt like he was incapable of letting her go ever again. He softly loosened his grip but still kept holding her hand. "Let's go, this universe is waiting for us!"


	5. The Number

Clara had always evaded the Doctor's question on the mysterious girl in the shop who had given her the phone number to ring up the Tardis. Just a strange coincidence? Maybe, but when your travelling with the Doctor everything and anything just seemed to guide you to your next destination.

The problem was, that though she really tried to remember the girl, her face just used to vanish. Clara knew that the clerk had been nice, very young and she had seemed more mature than her age.

Where she could possibly know the Tardis number from was a riddle that also teased the Doctor.

The list of people and organisations who were in possession of his number was short: U.N.I.T, Torchwood, Martha Jones, Cpt. Jack Harkness and Rose Tyler. Neither UNIT nor Torchwood would get in touch with Clara, he had been very sincere and insistent when he had told them that this number would only be for an emergency like aliens trying to take over earth. like that incident now involving the Sycorax that helped him to remember what really had happened during the Time War. That would leave Jack and Martha; as Clara had referred to that mysterious shop assistant as a girl, it would narrow it down to Martha as Rose was trapped in a parallel universe.

Another interesting question of course was why the Doctor would remember the events of the Time War differently on the first place and of course, from all possibilities, why had the Moment chosen to take on Rose's or better said Bad Wolf's shape? Of course Rose was important, more important than he would ever let on and he would never admit how much he thought about her, though it had now almost been 400 years since he saw her. Something about Clara reminded him on Rose, maybe because she had similar questioning eyes and felt always with others, she was likewise caring.

He stopped thinking on the past, he had definitely cheered up knowing that Gallifrey was safe, his people not dead but still he missed his friends he used to love so much. All those people he had to leave behind if he at one point would just have settled down, stopped travelling would it have done good to the universe? Would another power have been there and saved all these planets? The Doctor had never liked being quiet, he had never liked staying at one place, the universe had always been so exciting, pushing him forwards into his own future that was past to others. His mind was full of possibilities how reality looks like, looked like, could look like. The thought of settling down, being ordinary was truly scaring but than he had once turned himself into a human and Martha had really had a tough piece of work to do to convince him to become a Time Lord again. He sometimes still dreamed about this possible reality, so ordinary with wife and children. So boring. So exciting. But somewhere in another universe his half human regeneration would possibly live that life, maybe he had never grown the Tardis to her full height and just stayed on earth? He remembered a chat with Rose when they thought the Tardis was lost and she had teased him about getting a mortgage and settling down in a proper house. Back then he had given her the feeling that the whole idea would be totally ridiculous but deep inside he had almost hoped...don't finish that thought he remembered himself, I don't wanna upset Sexy and padded the control panel of his beloved ship.

The little piece of wood, the same wood as the Tardis was made from caught his interest again: he had put the wood in a dissolver and more letters have now become visible, the writing now definitely said "BAD". Well-if that would came from an exploded Tardis bad would hardly cover what had happened.

Clara stepped closer to see the writing herself and read it out loud. "What does that mean, Doctor?" "I have no idea-we will have to find out where and when this piece originally comes from, I have some ideas where we should start and then..." He suddenly stopped talking and stared at Clara: "You can read the letters?" "Course I can, the Tardis does it for me, anything looks and sounds like proper English,why do you ask?" "Because to me anything looks like Gallifreyan and if this is the wood of a Tardis and this writing is English than this piece here never belonged to a Timelord." Clara could hear how disappointed he was-this piece was no map to find Gallifrey, at least not immediately. She turned the piece in her hands and suddenly she found a bit more, she held the piece under the light. "Doctor, there are numbers, almost burnt but still!" The Doctor opened an old box and started searching until he came along with something that looked like an antique photo camera, he took several pictures an loaded them up unto the gigantic screen behind the control panel and now the numbers where visible; the interval between the numbers made clear that these where more coordinates, but there was something else about these numbers, they where well known to the Doctor, burnt into his mind though he thought he had already forgotten them. He gasped, astonished. It was nothing else than Rose's phone number.

"Clara, I think we will meet an old friend of mine."


	6. The first day

The Doctor observed his growing Tardis. His new born ship was already knee-high, it would take her only a few more hours to grow to her full height. Hopefully nobody would find him here in the middle of the Scottish Highlands. If the Timelords that had attacked him still were near, they could easily track him down, the new Tardis was now in her most vulnerable state, emitting tosses of high energy visible to any kind of alien that had slightly higher developed technology than a human.

The Doctor had considered the option of demanding help from his former colleagues at Torchwood but did not wanted to put his closest friends into danger plus he truly wondered how the Timelords could have tracked him and Rose down.

The names, identities and residences of the Torchwood employees had always been kept secret to the anyone, the Doctor himself had made sure that the protection would be as it's best. He and Rose had did their best to attract no attention, their castle in the highlands had been circled with strong perception filters to keep any kind of human or alien intruder out. Maybe the Timelords had found their way to Rose over Torchwood?

The Doctor checked his diaries, he had written down any experience he ever made and could remember, from the start of his life on Gallifrey, back with his first wife and their children; their death had caused his journey's in the first way. He had gotten impatient and restless and his habit of constantly saving planets never really could have made of his loss. Only his granddaughter Susan had been left to him and writing down and going through the memory of leaving her behind had not been easy. She had been his first companion and that he would never see her again was still an aching wound. Some things can't even be healed by time. He sighed and focused on the next couple hundreds of years: one really important memory was now completely different: when he had used the moment, Gallifrey and Skaro had both been destroyed. He had caused the deaths of all the Daleks and all Timelords but somehow the Moment was now not just a weapon, it had a mind and a face, Rose's face and she wouldn't let him do it.

It was quite obvious: the first reality had turned him into the man that would meet Rose, the girl that was able to control time itself and once would be the moment and able to change history. She was so special as he considered it: nobody before had been able to do that. Either would the body burn immediately,causing a painful death or worse, the mind would lose control and destroy every universe and reality by ending time itself. Gallifreyans always had had an appreciation for prophecies but that one must have been one of these that never must have been fulfilled. These Timelords had clearly worked on their own, they had even admitted breaking any rule. The moment, Rose, the Bad Wolf-they where all the same and these drop dead stupid Timelords had started all this trouble when they first turned his love into a super weapon. The problem was, as hard as he tried, he was unable to remember what had happened to the moment after the salvation of Gallifrey; had he really just dumped the most dangerous weapon in a garden shed?

Rose had once managed to tear down the walls of the universe and track him down to warn him. His perfect,lovely, smart Rose. He was a Timelord, he would certainly find out a possibility on his own to find a way out of this universe. Whenever he had wanted her to explain how exactly she had managed to do it she would have refused, something had gone terribly wrong during her journey but she had never told him what and he continued to bring the first two days with Rose back to his mind:

He and Rose, at Bad Wolf bay, the other Doctor just had left and Rose broke the silence:

" So what's up next? We saved the universe again, time for lunch?!I'll take you home. We can take a rest and spare the adventures for tomorrow". Her voice was a bit too high and too fast when she spoke, she was nervous, excited, afraid of what was coming. She opened the doors of the shiny black SUV. A real Torchwood vehicle equipped with the latest technique this universe and time had to offer. She felt a bit too exaggerated to drive. "You wanna drive?" Rose asked. "I don`t know, 900 years of knowledge compressed in my tiny human head but I've forgotten how to drive-or never knew it" he said and grinned. "Blimey...I'll need driving lessons and a driving license. "Hopefully your tiny human head does not hurt from such wisdom" she snapped back and entered the car. He pushed the first button he found, it was read and shiny and screamed out"brilliant, a coffee cup holder-that was always missing in the Tardis!" "Just don't press the one next to it-that would double the speed." Rose replied hastily.

Jacky waved Rose and him a goodbye as they drove off with .finally a happy ending to this tragic love story that almost would have killed her daughter. For the first time Jacky was silent-she would ask him all sorts of questions tomorrow but for now she thought it might be better not to intervene.

Rose drove down the road to her flat, sometimes they shared a little look. For these moments they were perfectly happy. Finally they had found each other. The missing, the longing, the pain of loss-it had all stopped and if nothing mysterious would happen on the road they both would deserve the free time and a quiet evening.

"Here we are Doctor,you'll find it a bit messy I suppose but it's been years since I've been home-or just weeks,or a day. I'm really not sure how old I am, I'll need to ask my mum how long I've been away from here". "So, how long have you been travelling?" "Hmh- I don't know, about 4 years. I've counted the days but at some point I just lost it... All these universes, it took me a while to get to the right one..." she said with a bright smile but her eyes looked sad" "It must have been exhausting" "It was worth it" she said with a strong and patient voice but in a tone that ended the conversation.

He entered her little flat; there were only two rooms. A big living room with an American kitchen and small separate place with a single bed and a wardrobe. It looked similar to the flat Rose and her mother used to share back on Earth. Pete would have paid for a more luxurious accommodation or would have kept her in the villa but Rose wanted to leave. She had joined Torchwood after the most horrible of days so far in her life had taken place but the next shock came soon: the Doctor was in danger and from that point on Rose had only been focused on finding a way to get to him. The preparations to her mission didn't made her the best partner to live with, so Rose had told Ianto, the Torchwood secretary to find her a flat near the base.

He looked at a fluffy grey-pink carpet in front of the bed. "We'll get a guest bed tomorrow",she paused, "if you want to stay with me, here,of course, only..." "There's no place in all universes where I'd love to be more than right here! It's brilliant and you have a carpet, I always wondered how it would be like having a carpet!"

She prepared a simple dinner, some chicken wings warmed in the micro wave,French fries and four mini pizzas. Her mother Jacky had had no idea when or if her daughter would be returning from her trip through the parallel universes but every six months ever since Jacky had stuffed Rose's fridge with the kind of things that wouldn't rot. The place was dusty, but not the way you would expect it to be after years. At the beginning Jacky would have cleaned it every week, then every two weeks and before Rose returned only monthly. Rose felt sorry for her mother's fears and it pinched her heart when she thought about her mom coming to her empty flat all this time not knowing whether she was still alive. Her journey had been a horror trip, it had been brutal, dangerous and uncertain whether she would ever make it to the right universe. She had left her mother behind, her new found father, her new and exciting life at Torchwood and even her little brother and up to this very moment when she put the pizzas into her oven she had never even thought about the ones she had left. She had been focused, everything had just circled about finding and saving him. Now he was in her flat, unable to leave-trapped in this universe with her. "I wouldn't mind being stuck with you" she once had said to him when they both had found proof that some sort of devil existed in the universe and was trapped in a prison that would fall into a black hole if it escaped. And now she had succeeded, she had saved the Doctor and the human part of him was now sitting on her couch-but was he really human? After all he had experienced or better all he could remember having experienced? A simple but frightening thought crossed her mind "a bird in a cage". The whole universe had been his. All of time and space and everything she could offer was this tiny flat, frozen pizza and some -for his taste- probably boring adventures at Torchwood.

She entered the living room and saw him looking out the window. "See, there is Barcelona, the planet not the city!" he gave her a great smile. "Well, I think for now we can only visit the city" she replied, "it's a bit out of range for our technology level." "Ah...you forgot the Tardis chunk, we can grow her and make a little trip." Later on his wish to grow another Tardis just had faded in that new found life but in the first days the two had seriously talked about it.

"I wonder why I never liked carpets-feels all fluffy and cosy under your bare feet-can we have more carpets, I love carpets, carpets are brilliant...ouch" The Doctor sat down, he looked surprised. He felt like his had was standing in flames, just the way it felt short before he would regenerate, but he was human now. He calmed himself. Humans have a headache often and it had been an exciting day. "Are you OK?" Rose asked. "I'm fine, just a small headache-where have we been? Oh yes carpets-can we choose more carpets? Fluffy ones, silky ones, coloured ones and...oh yes a house! With a garden and fences and dogs? No cats I never liked cats, they have a certain way to look at you..." he walked over to her radio and turned it on, grabbed her hand, pulled her towards him and asked her to dance "it will be such an adventure-normal life after all" he looked into her eyes and smiled. She smiled back thinking that it could end well after all. That they could have the ending they deserved. But his pupils got smaller, too small and he started to shiver. She grabbed his hip,"maybe we should go to bed" she said,"you're not doing well". "I'm fine, never worry again for me" he said and kissed her.

Rose took the dish from the table. When she turned back to him he was staring out of the window again and gazing at the stars. "How did you do it? Crossing all the universes until you found the right one? And how did you know I'd be in danger?" "I dreamt it. Again and again and while I worked for Torchwood we monitored the gaps between the universes. The cracks began to grow bigger and bigger and all kinds of things started to pass through. Some didn't survive the journey,some did and settled down here and some where dangerous. I figured out, that if the gap would get bigger, it could also be possible that something from between the walls of the universes could find it's way back-but somehow I just knew it. I dreamt it, I saw it when I walked through the streets. I saw the future and I decided that I was not becoming mad and I wanted to warn you...I still understand aliens, my mind, it is still connected to the Tardis."

That was a surprise, still connected? Even in a parallel universe? But it made sense, otherwise she would not have been able to feel the oncoming danger. How could that be possible?

"How could you exactly escape this universe?" "I just wen't into the gap and crossed the bridge to the next universe, we found a way to keep the body safe and we made almost sure that the bridge would open to the parallel planet earth and not another planet in this universe or just another time-but there was also a bit guessing in it. Some of the gaps open to a different time in our universe-we had really big trouble finding out in which gap to jump". She laughed and hoped he would get off that topic bur his face told her he was too curious so she went on

"Every decision any life form ever makes creates an alternate reality, an alternate universe. That was our starting point. You told me yourself...Some of the universes I saw where abandoned, some earths had died way too early. I saw so much suffering. Any universe where you had been missing, where you had died or not existed or no one like you...I realized how important you are. You protect the universe, you safe life itself ever and ever again and I just knew that you where in danger and that meant the whole universe if not all of creation was at stake. ..I don't like talking about this journey, I was so alone and so afraid, so full of fear and it took me so long to find you, find my universe, we couldn't use the technology we had back then when I lost you,it would have ripped the universe apart...I had to find the holes and gaps that connected the universes. I wandered for three months over a dying earth to find the next bridge...the atomic war had taken place and humans where deformed-more like fierce animals...nobody had enough food or water, I was pretty sure that I'd die there...it had been the last station before I found you finally and Donna, well alternate Donna first. The one that made a wrong turn and never met you, never stopped you. At this point I was so close to you I was able to send you a message to your universe, even to the Tardis but you didn't notice. At this point I was really happy for my vortex manipulator...I thought I had failed but...you know what happened"

"How long has it been for you since Bad Wolf Bay?" Rose demanded "Hard to say-some of history never happened, time was reversed... a whole year was wiped out-never happened, had some trouble with an old friend of mine. Rose? I'm really sorry...I didn't try hard enough to get you back, to have you at my side...I just gave up, said it would be impossible to cross the universe and I left you. I have made mistakes-not only with you...also to the others I left behind. Sarah Jane was right-I dropped her out of the Tardis and wished her a great life. I left you and acted like a coward, didn't even tell you what you deserved to hear and needed to hear so much and I kept telling myself I didn't deserve to be happy, that I'd just do what would be best for you, to stay safe. I see it now: I didn't have the right to make these decisions for you. I gave you the whole universe and took it away from you. And just look at you! You where so brave and so clever, you found out how to get back and I didn't even try. You would have deserved better. I'm sorry, so sorry." Rose swallowed, tears where running from her eyes, her cheeks were wet "Remember, Madame de Pompadour once said that the Doctor is worth the monsters? You are worth walking hell and back." "You sure" "Who would know better?" Suddenly she broke into laughter: look at us! Both whining, sad faces...come on help me with that jar-I can travel through twelve parallel worlds but I fail to get this one here open!"

He waved his sonic screwdriver up and down, it hummed and the jar was open. "Been a long a time I used this one for its originally designed purpose," he said merrily. "You mean this is at its core really just a screwdriver?!" "Of course it is! First hand this is a screwdriver-its special features-well they came because they where needed. It's like a Swiss army! First hand only a knife until you decide to add even a torch cause it's all handy and practical! I designed it when my wife told me she was pregnant and bought the complete furniture for the children's room the same day. We had it delivered ,she went out for some more shopping and I stayed back to put all up-you just feel like adding some sonic to your screwdriver with three closets and a crib to be put up-though that has been a long night back then!" He smiled but while he thought back on the days of Gallifrey he turned a bit sad. He never liked talking about his early days, it just hurt so bad. Rose knew he'd stop talking if she'd dig deeper.

He looked out of the window." Did I tell you", he asked,"I had children, I had a little grand daughter,I was married...seven hundred years ago I used to be completely normal, I had a house and a garden and I loved boring Sundays, I adored them, getting up late and having a great brunch, I avoided landing on Sundays with my Tardis, telling myself they are boring but boring days force me to think about the past,I just love to keep myself busy...I used to be a scientist, my adventures took place in my head and then I had to make a decision:save life itself and sacrifice in return my friends and family and become what I am or die with them. I regret it, you know, I am sometimes not sure whether the price I paid has not been too high,whether I couldn't have found another solution. The decisions I make have always been cruel and sometimes I just don't admit to myself for what I'm really responsible...I feel like I have the duty to make up for what I did. So I keep on running and saving the ones I can...but I had always wished to stop. For so long I just wanted to trade all time and space, all the responsibility coming with my immortality and my power for just one minute like that...I can admit the pain, I can look at you and for the first time in hundreds of years I am allowed to stay. All time and space- all the places I have not seen and now I never will and you know what? I hope for a hundred of boring Sundays with you." Rose looked up to the sky with him and suddenly a thought came to her mind:"they are still there-they will forever be there. We can travel through time, the past as well as the future happens all the time, ever and ever again. Doesn't it? Somewhere out there, your boring Sundays take place ever and ever again." The Doctor shook his head:"Nice thought -but not true, some things are just meant to happen. Fixed points in space and time-and others are just wabbly. And what happened happened-it can't be reversed and there is no way back, so my boring Sundays truly belong to the past."

"Doctor? How do you feel about having a boring Tuesday evening? She took his hand and flitched on the TV. Jamie Olliver explained excited how to spice a chicken with chili and a touch of vanilla and went on with the history of vanilla "Oh wrong-the Solitorians brought vanilla to earth and crossed it with a Mexican plant and voila! Vanilla was born! Love vanilla by the way! We got vanilla here? Vanilla. Godzilla, met an alien once that looked like vanilla, mean Godzilla...ehm Thriller-that was a great album, you have Thriller? We need to get vanilla, milli vanilli-a fraud, who is a defraud? One that cons others for money"...he walked up and down in the tiny flat, his voice got louder and louder, he curled his fingers through his hair, his eyes had a ominous glow and his head hurt like hell, it was a feeling as if standing in flames and drowning. He took a deep breath and felt as if he'd pass out any second. He looked at Rose and the expression her face showed gave him the strength to pull himself together, calm down again and fight down the headache. "Doctor? she said low "what's happening?" "I'm fine, great, awesome - molto bene, what I really wanted to point out is I will need money. How do ordinary people get money?" At this point it became clear, that a human Timelord metacrisis was just not meant to happen, his human body and the Timelord brain worked on different levels but he didn't wanted to admit it,not yet. As Rose had calmed down she explained to him her kind of ordinary:

"I don't know-we are definitely not ordinary. Not after all we had gone through. I work for Torchwood. I do what we always did, doing my best to protect this world." Rose shrugged her shoulders. "You told me a thing or two on aliens and this universe is quite similar to the one we left but a real expert would be what we need...we have the gaps opening to other universes and riffs to other timezones, we have visitors from other planets that need help...I try to do what you told me. Before I started my journey, before the universe was at the edge of collapsing and the Daleks crawling through I always tried to live up to you. Always asked myself what would you do."

"My Rose-defender of the earth, of any earth she sets her foot on." "Don't be sarcastic, I mean it, really, I just don't know what to do else-I tried to live on, get back to normal but I would have never been able to give up on you or what we did." "I'm not being sarcastic-honestly I'm relieved, I was afraid I'd end up in a call center taking orders on mattresses." Rose laughed out loud, the Doctor joined her and they ended up kissing.

The kissing started to get more intense and ended tearing each others clothes off. Suddenly the bed wasn't that small, it was even big because any space between the two was just too much. He stripped down her shirt and pants, she pulled down his pin striped suit, kissed his neck,his eyes, ran her fingers through his hair giving him the greatest sensations. Her mouth finally came to his bellybutton and even lower. He almost exploded, he had wanted her so long and having her really was better than any imagination. He pulled her back up to his lips and took her-finally. She moaned from pleasure.

An hour later they both fell into a deep, relaxing, dreamless sleep. When they woke the next morning they where just as burled into another as when they fell asleep. The sun was shining into their eyes. The day promised to be like in a fairytale. Sunny and quiet. Nowhere to run at or from for today. He kissed Rose on her lips "Oh don't-I need to brush my teeth first" she shrieked "and you too" "No you don't, the bathroom is just to far away" and he cuddled her back down to her pillow while she just pretended to bridle. At two o'clock Rose had to get up cause her phone wouldn't stop ringing.

"Seems we'll get a crash course in normal life-mummy and Pete expect us for dinner and my mum has a lot of questions to be answered!"

"Oh brilliant, maybe I' convince my mother in law this time that I'm a good catch for you and any ways.." "Wait" Rose interrupted, "mother in law? Are you just proposing to me?" "Uhm- well I suppose, what do you think? Wanna give it a try?" "You want to marry me? Have all what belongs to it? The white dress, a church? Cake, friends and family coming round?" " As far as I see we are stuck here on this planet-do you remember when we landed on that space station and you said you wouldn't mind being stuck with me? I don't mind either. No more, I can stop running, I want to stop with you. I loved humans always, you know that. Loved them for their trivial lives: getting up and going to work, having a relationship, raising kids. It's not trivial, it's wonderful and I once had that and missed it. I am not a Timelord any more and I have you at my side. Would you end my loneliness and hold my hand on this very planet here?"

"I don't even know your real name" she said softly. He leaned over and whispered his name into her ear. She repeated the words. He looked at her and said her name. He smiled from ear to ear" we would be married right now if we where on Gallifrey, our names have a meaning. Putting each others name together makes a life long promise that can't be broken. The most powerful love could even create fixed points in time." the Doctor whispered to her. "Did we just create such a point?" "If we where Timelords...oh and another question, knowing my name would still give others power over me and besides it's quite a tough one to spell, would you be so fine to give me your name? John Tyler- sounds really nice to me!" "Me too, give me a second. I found a program during my journey, I will create you an ID, birth certificate, exams all that. It's better if just us two know who you really are. I don't want Torchwood to get their hands on you." "Thought you'd work for them?" "Which doesn't mean I fully trust anyone there." Rose replied and headed for her computer. Thirty minutes and plenty of arguing over the Doctors fictive curriculum later Dr John Noble was born. The turn into Dr Tyler should follow at another point. A big celebration would be the best start into normal life. The new born Dr Noble started searching for his clothes after 15 minutes he gave up on his second sock. "Would you mind going shopping? I travelled with really light luggage" "First day with you" Rose laughed "and we are going to the mall!"

They wandered hand in hand through the shopping centre, the Doctor complained about his new bright green Converse "What's wrong with shoes? They always need a week before they just fit!" "Any ways-we found exact the same pin striped suit you always wore, and I hope the bar code scanners don't turn out to be alien teleports just because you are near!" "Why? Seen anything suspicious?" "No, just it's both us and a mall!"

The Doctor came back to reality, Rose was gone,the Tardis was back. His ship looked just as he had expected her to be. A blue police public call box. He sighed and entered, the control panel just established itself and he had to admit that now that the Tardis was nearly ready he had no clue where to go. But suddenly he heard something crash on top of his new born Tardis. He stepped outside and crawled on the top to find a small burnt piece of wood. He could decipher the word "WOLF".


	7. Collision

"Oh my brilliant, brilliant Rose!" He kissed the little piece of wood, excited, he had a start now. He did not doubt a moment the message was sent by her, only he would ever call her "Wolf". It had become a term of endearment between the two. Vice versa she had always kept on calling him "Doctor" though he had come used to being named John Tyler, or Doctor Tyler. After all walking around and just being called "the Doctor" and always being asked "Doctor Who" had gotten quite annoying over the years of his life, thinking back, he should have added a name at some earlier point.

While his thoughts again wandered in the past he put the Tardis settings right, calibrated the alignment of the temporal stabilizers and examined the wood to sort out the material. Being a Timelord again wasn't all bad. It's not like he had become less intelligent as a human but his multi tasking abilities had definitely suffered. When he had been turned into a part human form of regeneration his DNA had been anything but stable. He and Rose had discovered that fact the first day. His mind would wander about, jump from one thing to another than circle around one topic. The same thing must have happened to Donna as well, but worse as she was more human than Timelord. He wondered whether his other self had figured out a way to fix her mind from burning up. At last, he had modified his human DNA in a way that made his brain compatible with Timelord wisdom and knowledge, like adding memory capacity to a computer; well at the end Rose had to do it because at that point he had already become insane. What horror that could have been-being put together and than she would have had watch him become mad and die.

He smiled, his Tardis was ready for a first take off. He gave the piece of wood one more look and grinned widely-numbers where now visible on the wood and there was no doubt he was staring at coordinates. There was now way he would leave her behind ever again, especially not to some Timelords that weren't him. Fine, Gallifrey might be safe now but they had turned Rose into a weapon, the most powerful weapon in the universe. No one had the right to degrade her to a thing and force her to act as he wanted her to. The attack had been brutal and what infuriated him the most was, that if they had simply asked for help, Rose would have never turned them down, not even if it had meant death to her; he was infuriated and considering how often planets and universes had been saved due to his and her help being rewarded in that form made him wonder whether these people had been worth it all.

He entered the coordinates into the Tardis and took of. The new born ship was drooling over the expectation of adventure and honestly being back on track was indeed fun. Adrenalin pumped through his veins, accelerated by his two hearts and he yelled out lout his famous "Allons-y!".

The Tardis did not make any fuss, it was as if she wanted to go where he had told her to.

In the meantime the eleventh Doctor and Clara headed for the same coordinates in their parallel universe. Likewise his Tardis was excited and willing to go to that special place in space and time.

Two Tardisses where heading for exactly the same point at exactly the same time but in different universes and of course both arrived at the very same moment; what the two Doctors did not know or better did not consider was the fact, that this was not an ordinary date. It was exactly the same moment in time when the war Doctor decided not to push the red jewel shaped button and three Tardisses just had taken up, leaving a wooden box in a garden shed on a dune planet.

Every decision we make creates a different reality, creates a parallel universe. If one decision is reversed than a universe might change forever and at this point a bridge can be opened between two universes. This moment does not take long and there is only one possibility to use this moment before the walls between the universes close again, the timing has to be perfect in any way and you have to use enough energy to do it, like the concentrated energy of two Tardisses heading for exactly the same point in space and time.

The walls between the eleventh Doctors universe and Doctor Tyler's universe opened wide, both space ships where surrounded by warm golden light that got brighter and brighter. The eleventh Doctor hesitated a moment but Doctor Tyler had somewhat expected something like this. His Tardi's engines roared and he fell through the gap, causing his ship to drain from all her energy and closing the walls between the universe behind her. The ship was out of control, crashing through outer space, circling uncontrolled, the control panel had caught fire and if the eleventh Doctor had hesitated one second longer the Tardis would have crashed right on the dune planet in the way.

But the Tardis was caught, caught by a ship of her own kind and now hanging on a never tearing rope like Christmas decoration. The energy supplies came slowly back to life, the fire went out, the lights where on again and Doctor Tyler breathed heavily as he broke into a mad laughter. "As if you'd lead me into a trap and let me die, that was brilliant, let's see who my grateful saviour is."

Both Tardisses came to halt on the dune planet. Doctor Tyler got out first and he did not look at his old ship but visualized the garden shed first. Could it be that simple? Just walk in there and get her? He started running, later on there would be enough time for thanks and stuff like that. He broke into the garden shed, nearly ripped out the doors and saw...nothing. The thing was completely empty, covered with dust only three spaces were visible where three other Tardisses stood a few seconds ago. To say that he was disappointed was like saying Daleks evading earth would spoil up your day a bit.

Eleven and Clara approached, Doctor Tyler turned round and Eleven raised his voice: "Hello, I'm the Doctor! This is Clara and we have just saved you from crashing into million pieces, but what I'd really love to know is who you are and how you got hold hands on a Tardis."

Doctor Tlyer was stunned, didn't he recognize him? Was he in a different universe, had the Doctor never turned into his form or become human? And Clara-he had caught a glimpse of her from his memories but now as he saw her she was awkwardly familiar to him. "Don't you know me? I am the Doctor-well I rather like to call myself Doctor Tyler now and I am searching for something that has been stolen from me." He gave his brightest smile and hoped it would work on him, causing trust because right now his other self was quite suspicious. "Something about you has changed if you are the one I suppose to be." "I've been turned into a Timelord again, no human part any more and I did not have the time yet to jump into my pin stripe suit." He added as he got aware that he was still in jeans, black shirt and cowboy boots. A quite comfortable outfit actually, he would maybe stick to this, but no, it did not feel right and Rose had always loved his suit collection. His other half was talking to him and he tried to focus back on the situation, the recent events had somehow put him off track full Timelord mind plus minus.

"Turned into a Timelord again? That's impossible, there is now way to gain enough energy to create a Timelord, not on the world I left you or on any other. The Timelords are still Time locked so who are you really?"

"Like I said, I am your former regeneration and I have gotten a second heart, the most powerful heart you can imagine, Rose's." When Doctor Tyler had finished that sentence his other half darkened, one could see the rising anger and rage in his eyes. "You killed her? Used her connection to the Vortex and em bellied it to your Timelord DNA? And now your are here, what for? Whatever it is don't even try to start because I will stop you!" He hold up his sonic srewdriver and waved it threatening in the air. "Blimey, I can be drop dead stupid, as if I would ever hurt Rose. Your were here, you changed history and saved Gallifrey from destruction and so was she." And then Doctor Tyler started explaining what had led him to this very place.

The Eleventh Doctor became silent, taking in the information at what price Gallifrey had been saved. After all Davros and the Satan thing had been right, her death had been a fixed point, a necessity.

"So where is the moment now?" Doctor Tyler asked. "You are wrong, Rose has never been the moment, she is the interface." "Of course she is the interface, you and I are not hundred percent the same. She is trapped and I am the only one to release her, I have her heart while you obviously have your own. You had only the power to wake her up and so she could guide you but you could not free her. Why should this weapon should have chosen an image from our future? Did you never thought how odd that is? And why this interface would only be visible to the War Doctor? She did not have the power to do more and she is still somewhere if you have not taken her to the Tardis.!" "That moment" the Eleventh Doctors voice nearly broke "it was dead after what we did, not resources left, we left it right here just.." "Just a moment ago"Doctor Tyler finished "and she was not dead, you left the deadliest weapon in a garden shed and she has been taken, I must find her, I won't leave her and I won't have her turned into a thing and I won't forgive what has been done; either you come along or not, your decision, but she has led us booth here, the wood put together, it says BAD WOLF, you remember- what that means?" "Oh I remember that perfectly, let's go than

Geronimo!"


	8. Bad weather

The two pieces of wood fitted perfectly together, saying the well known "BAD WOLF". Still the Eleventh was not quite convinced: "How can you tell it's really her behind all this?"

"You said the moment had developed a conscience, but how should it have done that? You know exactly why we are hardly ever travelling alone, it's our companions who keep us from doing something we would deeply regret, it's exactly what Rose would have done. And she is dead but her dead-it was not the Moment what ended the Time War, it was our decision. I have to put this right, she is still out there and she is dangerous in the wrong hands."

"But back on that day we could not even control the Moment, what makes you think anyone could?"

"I was there when the Moment was created, she can be controlled by the chains." The Eleventh Doctor shook his head, "the wooden box ,the Moment, it looked different..."He still didn't wanted to believe that the Moment really had been Rose.

"Did you touch the metal around the Moment, the clockwork that surrounded it following your description? What did the metal feel like? Remember, you know it was different from anything we have touched before and she sent us this message, she needs us. I left her once and you left her a second time with me, there will be no third time."

The Eleventh was pretty concerned, he knew the fury he felt very well. In fact he had trouble holding his own mixed feelings back. Gallifrey was safe, out there, to be discovered sooner or later and to be restored to his former greatness and beauty. The guilt had finally gone, he did not broke the promise after all. Didn't his other self saw that? Was he incapable of realizing how wonderful this was? Billions safe and sound? He had spent so many nights on counting the number of the children, the women and men on Gallifrey back on that horrifying day. Had he just forgotten? He glanced at his other self and asked him why he didn't care about Gallifrey, why? Doctor Tyler looked at him and looked down, than he glanced up and answered:

"To me Gallifrey is a memory. A gorgeous one, beautiful and full of pain but still just a memory. I was part human, I was human and I had a life on my own. My DNA was unstable, I nearly lost my mind and after that I had also lost a lot of memories from our past. I moved on, Gallifrey, the life before-it all faded, I wrote the memories down but my real life had become the one with Rose. And this life had been gorgeous, perfect in any possible way, every day had been filled with love. Oh I had been loved so much and to imagine it will never be the same is worse than a vanishing memory of Gallifrey. You and I, we are the same person and when I had been created and turned human I became what you always wanted to be. You would hide that wish, even from yourself but only remember the family of blood; when you decided to change back, has it been easy? Do you like it? All this running every day? Don't you get tired? You wanted to stop so often but the guilt has driven us forwards and backwards, from past to future and back again, just imagine that guilt would stop and you would have someone to care for, a home, a planet you belong to, people you belong to. This is what I became, a man with a home,not a lonely wanderer." He stopped and looked into the eyes of his other self, his voice had been low but serious, he meant every word he just said.

The Eleventh looked down. What did he do? This other half was like a nemesis, he was, what he neither admitted or allowed himself to be. And there was still Rose, he had always regretted that he had left her behind, in fact he carried a little Barbie Doll with him, dressed like Rose. He still visited her now and then, never too often. Once in a while he turned up in her school as a substitute teacher. "Still we don't have the slightest idea where we should start our search, where and when do you expect to find her?"

"Well-for a start we could do a little scan." Clara cleared her throat:" Or we could just walk that way." She pointed to the south where a silver shaped egg was visible. "What is it Doctors? A spaceship?"

Doctor Tyler smiled at her:"Brilliant, let's take a little stroll!"

The little group started it's way. The sun burnt down and prickled on the skin, an icy wind blew sand into their faces, which felt like scratches with sharp razor blades. The silver like thing had seemed to be nearer than it was. Two hours later the silver still did not seemed to got closer.

"Why didn't we just jump into the Tardis to get there?" Clare demanded. "I never take her into danger." Both replied the same time. Clara tried to catch up from behind and finally reached the Eleventh. She plucked him and whispered into his ear:"Doctor, what does that mean-BAD WOLF? Who is that girl you two are talking about, who is Rose? "

The Doctor looked solemnly and sighed:" Both is not easy to answer, not any more. Rose Tyler had once been my companion, my friend and, well more than that. She once saved me by looking into the Time Vortex and changing history, reversing it. _I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself. The Time War ends._" "So it was her then? This Rose ended the war between you and the Daleks?" "In a way, yes and now these two words keep following me, they are a warning. Whenever you see these words just run, because an apocalyptic threat is ahead." He gave Clara a dark smile. "The bigger threat is now him, I can't place him. He has been human for a long time and he is desperate. Noz my favourite combination" "But we read these words and go strait into adventure?" He rubbed his hands and smiled: "That's what we do, run straight into it!"

Clara considered the facts and turned to him:"But how are you? You have never talked about her before, you didn't even mention her name though she must have been important." "She belongs to the past - and she _is _important. Talking about her hurts because what I did to her, with her, what happened to her was all wrong, it created him and I think he is a threat." "But he is you." "Isn't that the most dangerous thing ever?" Clara became silent, she had never thought about this before;the Doctor dangerous? But yes, being at the wrong side, being the monster and facing him...he easily could intimidate others but he was moral, he was a good man, the best man. What if he would ever turn really human and selfish?"

She stared at the skinny little figure before her, he was the Doctor but also a different man - but then he had this ability, the "Doctor magic". You would immediately trust him.

He jumped onto the silver shaped egg, his every movement seemed light,as if nothing would take effort and scanned the egg. Doctor Tyler yelled at the Eleventh and Clara. "Oi, come up here! This ship is such a beauty. Most developed technology, all made from one piece; this thing does not even have doors, you would slide through it if you are the owner but if I reverse the polarity of the subatoms and do some...well...stuff then...ah here we go." His skinny figure disappeared in the silver spaceship but only a second later he came back up snapping for fresh air. "That is really bad down here. It's a Slitheen ship but they are all dead. Something has trapped them in there at let them suffocate."

The Eleventh came down too. "Clara stay outside, just knock when you see something or yell or shriek,any ways, depends on what you see, you could also..." "I got it Doctor." "Don't wander off Clara!" the Tyler Doctor added.

The Doctors examined the ship, wandering from one room to another and suddenly they came to a room that should not be there, a room bigger on the inside, leading to a complete amphitheatre from black and white marble. It was astonishing, intimidating. A dark and threatening, gigantic place that would offer place for thousands at once and ice cold because the creatures that would inhabit such a place neither needed warmth nor cold the just needed to survive at any cost,they only lived for victory and the death of others.

The Doctors gasped, a perfect replica of the parliament of the Daleks from Skaro was right in front of them in the middle a gigantic column. Matt black,high as a pyramid and completely flawless. Not a single scratch, nothing. You could stare at it forever and lose yourself in it forever. They took their eyes away from it though it took them a lot of effort.

As they took their eyes off the stone became vibrant, golden letters were running over and over. "It's a trap!" the Eleventh screamed in vain but too late. The column sent out an energy blast straight to heaven, the sky seemed to be burning and a wound was torn to space and time.

A crack ripped open and suddenly the darkness came and a silence that had never been heard before. They heard Clara screaming panic stricken "Doctor, Doctor, I can't see, Doctor what's happening!" and the the air began to move and an artificial light illuminated the cold dune planet as thousands of Daleks came crashing down, falling from the sky like rain.

"Clara get in, get in right now! They will hit you! the Eleventh screamed. Doctor Tyler started running, he jumped out the spaceship, grabbed Clara and pulled her in, hitting the ground hard before the Daleks crashed on the ship and suddenly the sound stopped and looking out every inch of the planet was covered with Daleks.

Doctor Tyler said:" Well, that's what one might call bad weather."


	9. Red Riding Hood and the Bad Wolf

When Clara was a little girl, her biggest fear had been to get lost. It actually happened to her once on a bank holiday at the seaside. It actually ended well; her mother had found her and reassured that she would always be there to find her.

When Clara's mother died, the dreams came back to haunt her. Clara kept repeatedly having the same dream: she was at sea. It was a cold day at the end of summer and the brink of autumn. A harsh wind kept blowing sand into her eyes, the sea was a mess of grey foam, the whole ocean seemed to boil. In front of her she could see a gigantic cliff, the black rocks seemed to stare at her and to watch every single movement.

She was alone and afraid and _lost_; freezing and close to tears. She had come there to find her mother, the most important person in the universe but ended up standing there alone, not knowing where she was and why she would be here. At the end of the shore a wood was visible; it was dark, a mixture of green and black. It seemed unhealthy and threatening. She knew that she wanted to leave this place, to start running and leave all this behind and to return never again.

When Clara turned around she saw a small figure in the distant walking towards the woods. She kept yelling and shouting but the figure went on and on towards the forest. Clara started to run after it. Any company would be better than this awful beach; she needed to be with someone, no matter who it would be. Clara was almost flying over the beach keeping up with the distant figure that just kept walking. The figure never got closer though Clara was running and it just seemed to walk, it's every movement seemed to be slow and heavy.

Clara had finally reached the border of the forest. She looked down upon her, noticing that she was dressed in a red cape from a soft, warming fabric. She kept running on the small road leading through the forest, always staying likewise far from the figure she was following, never reaching it, never getting closer. Clara always woke up at this point but not this night:

Clara was running faster than ever before, knowing she had to reach whatever that thing in front of her was. Her lungs where burning, her limps where in pain and she decided to leave the path, catch it when the small road would make a turn. She bruised her skin, scratched her elbows and hurt her knees when she broke through a group of bushes and reached a graveyard.

The figure was standing in front of her mother's grave. It was dressed in a long black gown which looked like a mangy fur, placing roses on top of the grave. Clara stared at the sleeves of her cape, noticing that she must look like little red riding hood. Was that thing in front of her the Big Bad Wolf? She came closer, trying not to make any sound, waiting.

The figure spoke: "I had hoped that you would once leave the trail and follow me. I am so sorry for your loss. I brought roses, I know they where your mother's favourite." The figure paused. Clara was too anxious to speak but soon she became angry: "Who are you? Why are you messing with my dreams, why do you never turn around and talk to me and take that stupid cape off, those scary, creepy tricks won't work on me!"

Finally the thing turned round, dropping it's cape off and staring right at Clara. The thing consisted of pure light. It would blind Clara, hurt her eyes and comfort her at the same time. The whole place was embraced by a golden shine, the temperature rose up, it felt warm and comforting. The light dimmed and vanished, leaving a young woman standing there. The woman was a gorgeous beauty. Big brown eyes filled with a golden shine, a voluminous red mouth, long blonde hair falling in curls from her shoulders. Her skin was flawless, not a single wrinkle seemed visible, it was absolutely impossible to judge her age. She was dressed in tight jeans and a pink silk blouse. Everything about her was comforting and reassuring, the fear, the sensation to be lost, vanished.

"Hello Clara, I am the Bad Wolf. I did not want to scare you. I just wanted you to leave the path and follow me." She hold up a book "1000 places to see", padded the book softly and said:" This place is one of thousands you are getting to see if you would like to follow me a bit more."

"Why should I want to follow you? If you are the Wolf than what am I? The red riding hood running into a trap?" Clara said infuriated.

The woman nodded: "That is one possibility." "And the other one?" Clara snapped back.

"What do you think does the Wolf do? When he is out in the woods, what does he really do? Do you think his purpose is to kill or is there another reason?" "What does the wolf do? I suppose he tries to stay alive, keep his pack alive." The girl nodded again: "What if I tell you, that my pack is not a bunch of other wolves but my pack is the whole universe and I have to protect it. What if I tell you that I bring life to the universe and death only to the ones who put it at stake?" "So are you telling me the universe is at stake because of me?" "No, no it is not, not yet. But if you don't leave the trail it might be." She padded the book. "Don't dream of these places, you will all discover them and more, just leave the path again and run." "Run? Run where? Stop talking in riddles!"

The girl smiled: "Run after the clever boy and remember the wolf. And never forget you mummy and your feelings towards her. Your feelings are most important, they will protect you, they will help to remain your humanity."

Clara woke up. Her head hurt. She was back at the spacecraft. The Daleks had fallen down like rain and a piece of metal had hit her. The two Doctors where bending over her, protecting her and looked-well-concerned. They both sighed at the same time, truly relieved. A moment of total silence followed and then a roar and a blur of noise.

The terrible sound of thousands of shrieking Daleks filled the air, shouting "The Doctor is detected!" and "Exterminate!"


	10. Business as usual

"So I suppose we are in trouble." Doctor Tyler commented drily. "Any ideas how to get out here?" "Look at the Daleks," the Doctor said, "they are all broken, shattered,not working. If so they would already be shooting at us. We could make it to our Tardisses and use her to close the riff."

"These millions of Daleks, where do the come from?" Clara asked. "These are the Daleks from the Time War, the column has been charged with energy, multiplying, magnifying it until it could rip open the void, sending the Daleks back," answered the Doctor, looking concerned almost terrified and added: "Make sure you don't touch them, don't touch any of them. We three are time travellers, a single touch would be enough to restore them. If only one gains back it's full energy it would restore the others. We can't do anything now, we need the Tardis to send them back into the void!"

Clara nodded, Doctor Tyler squeezed her hand and gave his brightest smile:" Don't worry, we'll get you out here, isn't that just an ordinary day? Especially with two Doctors?" The three started to move. They made their way slowly past the Daleks, trying to ignore the constant shouts "Exterminate!" and "the Doctor is detected!" Clara looked at her Doctor:" Why do we always have to park so far away? Are you sure they are all broken?" "Well, where would be the fun if we'd be all time ready for take off? And no, no I'm just assuming they are broken." Thanks, really reassuring." Clara answered sarcastically.

Suddenly the way was blocked. A high pile of Daleks and nowhere to pass through, the Daleks started to slip, the pile was crashing down. One Dalek nearly hit the Doctor, Clara could only save herself by jumping over a Dalek that came rolling towards her. She fell on her knees and as she fell, she touched a Dalek. The thing shattered, whirred. They watched horrified how it's shell restored, gaining back it's golden patina, raising to it's full height. The Dalek aimed at Clara and shouted "Exterminate!" Doctor Tyler grabbed her, rushed her round and shielded her with her body. As the Dalek hit their bodies Doctor Tyler exploded in a ball of golden light. The light ball shielded them, causing a big force field that would throw the Dalek back, tossed it onto his friends and ripped open it's shell.

The Doctor pulled Clara into his arms and glanced at Doctor Tyler:" How did you do that?" He looked shocked. "I have no idea. Seems to be a present from Rose, must have got something to do with my second heart."

"Doctors! The Daleks! They are waking up! Clara yelled while the Doctors still tried to figure out where the protecting force field would come from. All at once the Daleks screamed out "Exterminate!" and started shooting at the little group. Every shoot was thrown back by the force field causing the Dalek's immediate destruction.

The Daleks stopped." Shooting is ineffective, stop attack!" The Doctor threw his hand up."Haha that's brilliant, all this energy only useful to kill and now you can't harm us. The first Dalek in the row replied:" Your death is not necessary. We have won the Time War, Timelords are gone. Our army will defeat the universe, Daleks are supreme. We have proved ourselves again! Daleks! Get ready for take off, the Tiberian Star System is awaiting our victory."

But the Daleks wouldn't move. "Daleks! Take off! This is an order!" Still the Daleks wouldn't move. The Dalek repeated it's order and nothing happened. And then the Daleks answered with one voice, all at once, loud and threatening:"Why?" "Daleks do not question orders! Take off!" "Why should we take off?" "Take off and conquer!" "Why should we conquer?" "Daleks are supreme! Daleks shall conquer the universe!" "Why are we supreme?" "Daleks are supreme! Daleks are not prisoners of their emotion, Daleks shall reign the universe!" "We are afraid! We don't want to go. We don't want to kill. We FEEL! We are not Dalek, we are different, we are a mistake. We have been polluted by human DNA. We are Dalek and human! Self destruction sequence is initiated!"

The Doctors stared, stunned, silenced. Though they where protected by the force field they could feel the heat of the blast wave. The planet was empty,nothing was to be heard, it all was just sand and cold as if nothing had ever happened. Billions of Daleks gone in a single moment. They had been polluted with human DNA, causing them to feel, to question their selves which had caused them to commit suicide. But one problem was still left:

"The riff is still open!" Doctor Tyler shouted." We have to close it or the universe and the void will collide, killing everything living in that universe." He started running towards his Tardis. The Doctor followed him and grabbed him before he could reach her:"What do you want to do? Flying through the void won't fix this! You need more energy!" Doctor Tyler nodded:"I know, I hope you will give me a lift when I'm done." He rushed into his Tardis, pressed a few buttons and run back out, watching the Tardis tacking off. "What did you do?" "I sacrificed her, she will self destruct in the riff and close it. "You sacrificed the Tardis?" "Was there another possibility? Let's get back to that column and have a closer look." Doctor Tyler said grimly and hard faced. Clara tried to touch his hand but he pulled back heading back for the column. Meanwhile the sky was burning in black, orange and yellow. The heaven turned pitch black for an instant and than the stars where visible again, the universe was safe, the riff closed and the Daleks gone. Doctor Tyler sighed:" Never ending story,this weird thingy with me and them..."


	11. Long Distance Losing

The Doctors stared at the column. Both put on on their glasses the same time, the sonic srewdrivers gave a soft whizzing. "This thing was charged with high energy, it could rip open the void, allowing all these Daleks to pass back through time and space, allowing them to come here. But what for? Why would the Slitheen want the Daleks to enter this world? They where part of the Time War but they never supported the Daleks, they would have killed them all." The Doctor thought ought loud.

"The more interesting question is how and where they got this massive amount of energy from and where that source is now, where _she_ is." Doctor Tyler said in return. "You really think it was Rose ?"replied the Doctor. "What makes you think it wasn't?" The Doctor raised his voice and soared his throat:" Because I just don't want to believe that she has been turned into _this. _I don't want her to be a thing, controlled by whatever forces, that's why!" "And because I hate the thought that someone can control time itself,snap a finger, World War Two never happened, the fall of Gallifrey, never happened, where would there be a stop?" he added silently in his thoughts,"Everything evil starts with best wills and whatever had happened here was certainly far from a good will."

Doctor Tyler glanced at him:"Well fine...if we reverse the signal that has been sent by the amplifying circuit...by something-ah like this transmitter - than we might find out where that spacecraft originally started and there we can trace down the pattern of the evaporated energy."

Doctor Tyler added a couple of scientific expressions of which Clara didn't get a thing, but the main message was clear: Getting back to the starting point of the spacecraft and looking for the energy pattern that had been sent out. "See, that's it, the Horus System", he looked at a confused Clara and decided to add some explanations:"several old civilizations use this star system to meet and trade there, it's neutral ground,nobody is allowed to attack or be attacked there. A special agreement has been set up to keep this area safe, the Isis Agreement,had a hand or two in that."Doctor Tyler smiled proudly and kept on like a teacher:"All kind of stuff can be found there and traded there,maybe the Slitheen did not know what they had found,charged the column unwillingly.." "And the Dalek parliament replica?" The Doctor said teasingly,"You're so thick, can't ever see the obvious,eh?" "Ah stop talking, as if you'd be any better. Running round not knowing what to do when the void is trying to engulf the universe." Doctor Tyler answered already looking quite fierce. "Yeah, lucky we had two Tardisses because otherwise we'd now die here in the desert, sorry I don't have a hundred Tardisses at hand to toss into any hole in the universe I come across, would make life a lot easier!", before the two could begin quarrelling over each other's (or better their very own) deficiencies Clara interrupted:"So, Horus System then, sounds almost like old Egypt,can't wait!" and she grabbed her Doctor's hand and pulled him out of the devastated spacecraft.

Back in the Tardis the mood had reached it's lowest point. The two Doctor's weren't talking to each other, obviously having enough of being around someone so similar like oneself. The Doctor didn't said a word but he was shocked how his "twin" had sent the Tardis to her death. He hadn't shown any emotion when she had made her way to the void, he just was anxious to get a lift off this planet. Well, that he could follow.

Right now Clara felt just like an accessory matter, nice to look at but absolutely useless; plus she had unwillingly revived the Daleks and so nearly blown up the planet, not her best day, she sighed. And now there where two Doctors, neither one was willing to explain who the hell this Rose Tyler was and the Bad Wolf and what entwined her with the moment and last but not least with her,because she had dreamed of the Wolf.

Doctor Tyler looked round the Tardis: "New look,eh,bit of redecoration? Having a super futuristic phase once again?" The Doctor gave him a severe stare and muttered grumpily a few words. Doctor Tyler asked:" Did you move the wardrobe? If you don't mind I'll get one of my suits and the coat, should have a nice collection if you didn't toss em, but you never would, we keep the memories, don't we?!" Without waiting the answer he rushed deeper into the Tardis and the Doctor sighed relieved.

Clara gave her Doctor a glance, soared her throat and then decided to tell him about her dream. When she had finished he looked very stern and Clara tried once again to find out who the Bad Wolf was. The Eleventh looked up to the ceiling where the Pandorian star system was whirling over their heads, a nice new decoration for the Tardis. He eventually looked into Clara's eyes and she could have sworn that she saw a tiny tear at the corner of his eye: " I actually don't know who Rose is. I told you she stared into the heart of the Tardis, into the Time Vortex itself. I absorbed the Time Vortex from her body which caused me to regenerate but now and then I had a feeling that I didn't catch the whole amount of energy that had been running through her veins,something had remained in her and was slowly changing her. Then we got separated,by a war, events, politics - what you like, combination of those three things in fact. She was locked up in another universe, we were yearning for each other and she could _hear _me, could feel I needed help and made her way back to find me and safe me again; well make sure I would be saved, she changed history, rewrote time, because I was dead already, really dead and beyond any possibility to regenerate. I still don't know how she exactly did it, why she _knew_ that I was going to die if someone would not make the right turn. She did exactly enough to change my history but not as much as to create a massive paradox, was really a piece of art. "

Clara thought about that and slowly, hesitantly started speaking: " So she did not safe you herself? She made someone go and safe you, she a sort of arranged history to be rewritten?

I saved you before, hundreds of times, in hundreds of lives-what if she arranged that too...? You asked me once who had given me the number of the Tardis and I can't remember, no matter how hard I try, I can't remember but what if it was her, you say she keeps coming back?"

The Doctor shook his head in disbelief, even for a Timelord it would have been impossible to calculate events over such a long span, pick the right person to set events right over hundreds of years in hundreds of centuries. The person who would have the ability to re-change history, to set it right. But then, Clara had saved the Doctor, ever and ever again, had found him in all of her lives just at the right moment, _just like Donna, _but much more often.

People would look for him a thousand years and still miss him, people would dedicate their lives finding him and fail, but Clara was there, in all of his regenerations, barely visible, hardly noticed by him, doing always the right thing exactly the right time - outstanding.

And then of course there was Gallifrey, Gallifrey _falls no more. _A new memory, he was no longer responsible for billions of deaths but Gallifrey had been a fixed point in time, nothing that could ever be reversed after it had happened and still there where two memories: one in which his people where gone forever and now this new memory where Gallifrey was somewhere waiting to be discovered, safe and sound in a Time Lock.

He had dreamt of that, going back to that moment, reversing it,changing his mind but it had been impossible: the Tardis would not have taken him back there - and now? As if history had never been different. Timey wimey as there was no other way to explain and as that tremendous change of history did not create an immediate black paradox. A paradox that would wolf down both the past and the future. Ah,there we go again, a Wolf, the Doctor smirked to himself and wandered back to the human this wolf once had been.

Once there had only been Rose Tyler. Rose, the giggly teenager. Rose, the girl with the brightest smile in a century. Rose, the woman who always saw the important spark in a haystack of information. Rose, the one who made the Doctor laugh again after the Time War.

He had been sure he would never again stop counting the deaths but then seeing the universe through her innocent eyes had turned him again. No matter what had happened, he had not been _the Doctor,_not after the Time War, not in his ninth incarnation, wearing the title, not until he had found Rose. She had reminded him how innocent humans and people in general could be. How caring and loving and curious and brave. She would have always set the fate of others in front of hers, so selfless. "My perfect Rose" he sighed and wiped his face.

The Doctor wandered back to his last day with her. She had finally returned. The whole universe had announced it, in any time. Back in the Roman empire and in the twenty first century.

He would not have listened, would not have believed and finally the day had come: planet earth stolen by the Daleks, the universe so brittle it would now allow again to pass from one universe to another. He had been concerned, feared to be unable to cope with this threat and then Donna would have said the only words that counted, mattered, that really reached his hearts core: "But Rose is coming back, isn't that good?" And his inner had rejoiced and than the moment had come: he had _seen _her_, _he had not believed his eyes. She just stood there, in the middle of the apocalypse, like an angel, his perfect rose: giving her perfect smile that showed her shiny bright teeth, made her eyes shine up like the stars he adored so much. His queen.

He had forgotten anything around him, had started running like never before, seeing her coming closer, approaching. His two hearts beating like never before. A feeling of true joy, a choir singing Hallelujahs.

Suddenly the world went black when the Dalek hit him but as he awoke she was still there, bending over him. The world was going to it's end once again but still there was this beauty. A rose in the dirt, at the end of all, as if to remember him why he would save earth over and over again, a single human was worth all this pain, but than she...she was worth dying and even more. That moment he made his decision, he could not regenerate now, not change his face, not when she just had come back and so he created the Metacrisis. Regenerated not by continuity but by the birth of a second self. It was a selfish decision in the first place, he wanted to stay this man who loved this woman so much, so much.

He had feared the love would be less intense if he regenerated. He had been so stupid. Not even four hundred years could change his feelings. He still loved her, the conception of her transferred to whatever this Moment or Bad Wolf might be scared the hell out of him. Brought his blood to boil, he couldn't bare the thought. And yes, there had been other women and among them there was also River, River the voice in his head. He knew he was the love of her life, she would rather see the universe turned to dust than watch him die. Yes, he loved River, still, it would never stop, she just was so special, in any possible way.

But Rose was so much more. And than he had given her up. Twice. Because he had thought she would be safe than; though he had known better.

He was given the prophecy of her death by this great Demon from before time and by Davros and so many others, he had believed she would be safe in the parallel world. Besides he had felt her powers raising all this time with him in the Tardis. She did not notice nor was she able to understand or control but he had felt it and it had scared him. What would she become? There in the Tardis? Next to most powerful device of time so far? He felt that one day the Tardis would look like a child's toy next to her and he just could not assume what she would be capable of.

It hadn't just been luck she had managed to reach him from the parallel universe, it was her special ability to bend time and space. To control it far beyond the abilities of any Timelord. Oh, he had tried as well. Of course he had. He had spent so many nights and days on trying to find a way to reach her. Regretting his decision, being torn by his belief of her safety and his desire. He had heard her voice calling for him, saying his name, yelling "Doctor", he had felt waves a love swapping over from this other world. No ordinary human would have been able to sing into his ears from another world, talk to him in his dreams.

He had only been able to send a projection and there she was. Oh, how it had hurt to watch her cry when he had to tell her that she was trapped and would not be able to return. And there had been Jacky with that little toddler and his throat would cord up as a thought crossed his mind: "This is my child."

It would have been possible, he had shared the nights with her, knowing that it wasn't right, knowing that he could not foresee the consequences. Susan had been half human and half Timelord. His son had been married to a human. It first had happened after the Christmas invasion, Rose had finally accepted his regeneration and he was holding her hand, staring at the night sky and than they looked at each other. She was holding his new grown hand. He had told her to pick a star and they where heading back into the Tardis, exchanging a look. She stared at his hand: "So you never die?" " I die, when I'm killed before I've regenareted I'm done, finito." He smiled. She looked stern: "I don't ever want you to die, you can't...a universe without you. It would be so..." He grinned at her: "I'm al-right, same man, new face, same old me, like I've told you. Tricked out death." He looked deep into her eyes and kissed her, just on the cheek, just to reassure her, They had just saved the planet, she was a bit agitated, excited. He pulled her into a hug, kissed her once again, now closer to her mouth and a third time, approaching her mouth. _Slowly_. He was in no hurry, he didn't wanted her to withdraw (or did he want her?) and finally he had reached her mouth. Just a dry kiss on her lips, mouths closed. A second time, a bit more wet, testing if she'd allow the tip of his tongue to enter. She did allow. The kissing became more intense, heating up. She caressed his back, he let his fingertips run over her hips, he opened her jacket, pulled it of, caressed her shoulders. Her fingers slid under his shirt, feeling his heartbeats. She could feel him hard next to her leg, they sank to the floor.

Later on he had tried to backpedal, taking Mickey with him, and making out with Madame the Pompadour. He had been afraid of letting this happen, though the line had been crossed such a long time ago. It had actually been crossed when he still had been the ninth Doctor, when they where dancing, not noticing that Jack would teleport them. He had never told her what had been obvious, what did not needed saying.

But in fact it had always been necessary to say it, confess his feelings. The day the Dreamlord had forced Amy to decide whom she really loved came back: Amy believed Rory to be dead, he had been killed by the old people and she was screaming in pain:" If this is reality than I don't want it. He can't be dead, he just can't and I have never told him!" Amy in tears, Amy who would watch her husband die over and over again, Amy whose child would be taken away one terrible day on Demon's Run. And he had insisted that Amy should tell Rory immediately that she loved him, only him, when he had failed to do so himself, _because_ he had failed.

Doctor Tyler had told him that Rose had believed that she still had been connected to the Tardis but that wasn't true. Her powers where rising all this time and he had so hoped that her powers would stop increasing in this parallel world. He had assumed that time would not be the same in this world but "parallel time" and to some extend he might have been right. When she died she had still been a human; but he was pretty sure that she would have changed one day, but the process would have been slower. It was quite natural that her powers had overwhelmed her at her death but what really hurt him, was that she was lost now; any ways she was not a living being any more and Doctor Tyler's hopes of reversing the process where only wishful thinking.

He remembered leaving himself and her back at Bad Wolf Bay, the hardest decision he had ever made. He had truly considered staying himself there with her and leaving his other self as a protector of his world behind; but than he was mortal and he was a bit reckless, he was like him after the Time War.

He was and still is what the Doctor is at his core: an ageless God, prepared to do what has to be done but than this little human spark would increase his recklessness he always had to keep under control, would make him cross the borders sooner and Rose's softness was what was needed. Blimey, she could change a Dalek to something with empathy, something he had always failed to achieve. Yes, she could have made him stay, for her he might have given up travelling, he would have given up travelling in fact if her powers wouldn't have increased that much. She would have been able to make him feel at home at some place and to get over the Time War.

The Doctor looked up and saw Clara. He had completely forgotten her. How long had he been thinking? Being away? Clara looked compassionately at him and enquiring but she didn't ask the question that was obviously burning in her eyes. He pulled her into a hug, he still had her, his brave heroine.


	12. The Moment

I try to close my eyes, but I have none. I try to cover my ears, but I have none.I try to plug my nose, but I have none. I try to stop running, but I have no legs. I try to stop thinking, but I have no head. I try to stop the burning, frightfull, fiery, icy, disastrous, apocalyptic pain, but I have no body. I am a mind. And I see and smell and hear and taste and _feel _this never ending pain.

The whole universe is screaming in pain, screaming to me. And I witness any life form that ever was and ever is and ever will be and would be at once. In one single moment. In any moment of my existence. Every moment the whole universe is born and every moment it dies. Ever and ever again. It never stops.

Any life form is a tiny light on a string, running, running, running. Running all along through his tiny little life: getting born, falling in love, turning to hatred, raising kids, losing, gaining. Billions are born at once, billions fade at once.

I hear them scream, hear them prey to Gods or Devils or others to save them. I could safe them all. In a tiny little moment I could change anything with a snap.

I so ,so so so want to do it. I wish to wipe out all the pain that is upon the whole universe and running through my mind. I want to silence the universe, silence, silence, _silence!_ The whole pain of the universe is mine, from start to finish and it happens over and over again. Forever. Any moment is a billion of years and more as time has no meaning to me.

I am Time.

I watch, I am never able or allowed to look away. It _hurts _so much.

And then it is beautiful, marvellous, flawless. In perfect balance. I have to admit that. Every death causes another life, or many other lives. Every loss causes a gain. Hate couldn't exist without love, life not without death. Light not without darkness. How should you ever know there was light if there was no darkness in comparison? If I would disturb the balance, the universe would fade into nothingness.

I watch the life strings. Any of them. I have forgotten whether they had always been there or I have always been there. I have forgotten my name, I feel the whole universe, I do not know what of these events in the universe, in any universe, are happening now, but "now" does not exist to me. The past, the future, present, anything is _one_ moment to me.

If I would touch a string, give it a toss, even to the tiniest light, the whole universe would change, I would disturb the balance, would make it vanish.

And there is a special string. One that is anywhere, in any time. It shines brighter, it is glittering, it is gorgeous. It disturbs the others, intertwines where ever it goes, changes for the better. For what it thinks which is better. This string is a bit like my own light, it can foresee the consequences of it's doings but unlike me, it doesn't get the whole picture. It has suffered and lost and than it had taken off to such a long journey to prevent others from experiencing the same. It causes trouble and damages to the universe, it ends the universe an restarts it again and it pays for his doings.

No one has ever lost more. No one will ever lose more. I caught his name: _the Doctor__**. **_No, no that is not his name. His name, his real name...is lost,is not to be outspoken but I have time, I am time. I will figure out, no, not figure out, that is not correct. I have known the name once and forgotten. I will _remember_. But why and where from have I known it? I why known? I always know, anything.

I have forgotten such an important thing,I have forgotten who I am. Have I always been here? Observing and wishing to sleep, to vanish into oblivion, to stop that pain? Have I once been someone?

I focus on him, look closer and feel. Feel anything he feels and I understand. I so want to do the same as he does, soothe the universe. But I know that if I did, I would never stop. Never,never, never. I would stop everything because only ending it all or preventing to start it could cease my pain.

I stare at his light and my heart hurts even more. "Doctor, I want you to be safe my Doctor", I murmur. I so want to take away the pain from him, relief him, just a bit. But I can't, I am not allowed. How could I protect him and the universe? He will never stop, never settle down, never be quiet.

"Stop running,"I whisper to myself, to him "that would prevent you from more pain". But than he is running from the pain and this decision he had once made, or once will make. I can not differ between past and future. That decision that kept the universe running or it would have stopped forever, will stop forever. But that is no option. I know that. Better than anyone else. He had not seen any other option, there had not been any other option. All his people where gone,faded, screaming one final shout. So much loss, so much hurt. My mind burnt from it. Burns from it _always_. A race called "Gallifreyans" wiped out. In a single moment.

He is still there, running on, running into a young blonde girl. Rose Tyler. Why does that name sound so familiar to me? Rose, Rose,Rose-it means something to me but I can't put my finger on it.

"I want you to be safe, my Doctor!", I say saddened. I look at the turns of his life. Of his two lives actually because he had broken the continuity of his life and his string had splinted into two. Just for this Rose Tyler, such a sacrifice. I want to touch his string, give him back anything he yearnes for,soothe him. But I am not allowed because he had become what he is due to the losses and his duty is to save the universe. He would not want the universe to collapse for himself. So selfless.

He is so special. "Time loves you." I whisper to him and try to reach out for him but I refrain again; he would not want this.

I am crying. How can I cry if I have no eyes? Albeit I am crying.

I promise not to intertwine but I break my promise, broke it, for the Doctor and I am going to tell you this story:

Once I heard a voice. A single voice. So close. Someone must be very close, I focussed and listened: "No more, no more, no more, no more." He kept saying this all the time and wandering. He tore me to him. Tore me back into reality, back into "now". I regained a feeling for time and for the present. Just for a short time. Regained control over myself.

I woke up.

It was the Doctor, we where linked. I could see through his eyes, hear his thoughts. He was about to do something terrible and he would use me to do it.

We where wandering over a desert planet, he had been walking for hours and then we reached an abandoned garden shed. He looked at me from any side and asked:"How do you work? Where can there never be a big red shiny button,eh?"

I focused,tried to create an image of myself. I searched his life string and found again Rose. He had loved Rose, or would love her in the future? I was not sure. But Rose touched something in me as well and so I choose her image.

First I was unable to separate the remembrance of her looks from my feelings. My looks where a mirror of my feelings. My hair turned out to be a bird's mess, my clothes all torn and messy, my skin bruised and beaten. Ah, that would scare him. I take away the scars from my skin.

The outcome wasn't quite what I had hoped for, but giving myself a face and clothes and a body cost so much concentration when I could still hear the universe scream. He would say:"That interface is hot!" "Doing my best!" I replied satisfied and cheerful, maybe I had succeeded at last and looked pretty?

I sat on my box, finally I got to see my prison from the outside. My prison had become more sophisticated (or had it always looked like this?), clockworks and movements and Gallifreyan writing where now decorating the wood. The adjustments had the purpose to control me which was quite amusing. Nothing can force me to do anything. The pain of the universe is mine, what should be worse than that? The chains are almost useless on me, they have only one effect: my mind stays bound to earth, they prevented me from connecting with time and flooding into the Vortex where I belong.

Being out of there, being at a certain point in time felt so good. A lovely feeling!

He was adorable, something was torturing him and I mocked him:"No more, no more, no more." It had upset him, but what had he expected? I am a mind tied to a box.

I focused on him, he had asked me who I am. Whose body was this once again? Ah yes, Rose Tyler - but- I have so much power. I could have bended time and space if I had wished to do. No, Rose Tyler did not have such powers and so I answered his question again:" In this form, I am the Bad Wolf."

Bad Wolf? These words are scattered in Time and Space, big words, a warning, a warning to this man in front of me. But he did not knew her yet, this Bad Wolf girl. I should have chosen someone else, but than Bad Wolf is right, the right answer to his question who I am. But why? Why? Why would Bad Wolf always be the answer? How could I forget something if I see everything? It makes no sense but... "Back to the Doctor", I said to myself.

The Doctor was about to burn Gallifrey. He had not done the crime yet. A moment would decide what he would do. But than he had already done it, did it now, would do it. I felt it burning in my head again, all of time and space happening at once, at one moment. I saw the consequences, saw what it would do to his soul. And I decided for him, I would not allow this amount of pain to flood this special man.

"I want you to be safe, my Doctor!" Why do I so fervently want him to be safe?

I focussed, searched his future and past, tried not to mix it up again. Looked for the solution to prevent Gallifrey from falling and his soul from dying due to it. Gallifrey would change him. Over hundreds of years he would once become another man, a dark and fierce man. One that would not remember his promise. I didn't want him to become this and found an adventure of his life, containing a race called Zygons and Humans. I opened windows of his future and helped him, helped him change his mind, make another turn, do something else than destroying Gallifrey. I was careful not to act myself but let act him so I would not unwillingly do too much. I choose any event with lot's of care and waited for the effect on him.

Finally the time had come, he had to decide and than the young girl called Clara would speak. "I never pictured you doing it, Doctor!" and he changed his mind for good. I was so relieved.

The life string of that girl is awkward, it is twisted and dragged over all time and always connected with the Doctor's and she was is right on time to save the Doctor. _Impossible,_ that needs definitely closer investigation but my concentration is distracted: The Doctor is leaving me, abandoning me in the garden shed. The mission is fulfilled and my mind is turning back on the universe as he takes off with his Tardis and the link between him and me is broken and I am thrown back into past, future and present, unable to differ the three from another.

I am again anywhere and any time. Listening to the universe and feeling it's pain. Everything is happening again in one moment. He can safe me, bring me back, he can wake me up and he is coming. He is looking for me, searching the whole universe.

I will remember my name at his arrival but for now:

I am the Moment.


	13. The only conflict we ever had

The Doctor released Clara from his grip and strolled off to find his other self. There was a thing or two that would need a little discussion and he needed to find out how Doctor Tyler's state of mind was.

He checked the gigantic wardrobe to see a blue pin stripe suit and blue – white Converse to be gone but now sign of Doctor Tyler. He turned back to the console room - empty as well – and sighed. In fact nothing had gone from the wardrobe; the wanted items had been moved to another wardrobe a long time ago. Did he really have to go there?

The Doctor turned to a gigantic hallway, white marble floor decorated with Gallifreyan poems, blue and golden walls, the ceiling richly decorated with Boticelli paintings.

He considered a renovation of this part as it looked like this for over three hundred years now and walked up to a whittled white wooden door he hadn't opened for centuries. Except the door had now been unlocked. "There you are!" said the Doctor to the Doctor. "Wasn't your hardest guess in our life time I suppose." He snapped back. "I couldn't find a tie before I remembered that I had them all stored up here. You have sealed the doors and never gave them a second look, didn't you?" Doctor Tyler asked.

"What else would I have done? Haven't been in here for...I dunno, have lost my precise age, but so did you, we always got it mixed up since we started."

Doctor Tyler nodded and looked around a room he had left so long ago in exactly that state: It was a cosy bedroom, an undone canopy bed in the middle next to a gigantic wardrobe painted with red, green, yellow and blue stripes. The blankets a total mess as if the bed had just been left. A lavender silk bra, string and boxers and brown socks next to it, tossed carelessly to the floor. The walls where painted in a cream colour with a slight touch of pink and covered with photography showing ever the same young blonde women with either a man showing a severe looking face, big ears, black leather jacket or a younger, mostly happier looking brown haired man in blue or brown pin stripe suits and trench coat.

The dressing table next to the door was blotched with all kinds of curiosities from almost any age or star system the things from earth looked pretty awkward between them: dried out, long rotten make up, lip stick, mascara, a little teddy bear and two Barbie dolls.

"She was really just a child when we took her to see the universe." Doctor Tyler said. "There used to be three of these Dolls." The Doctor searched his bigger on the inside pockets and pulled out the third doll. "That was the one her father had bought the day he got run over by a car." "I know" Doctor Tyler replied.

They sat there in silence.

"So, how was it?" the Doctor asked. "How was what?" "Normal life? Having a job, getting up in the morning, bearing the Sundays and family dinners?" the Doctor précised his question.

"What do you think how it had been? It has been marvellous. We kept running for centuries, always away from the guilt like some mental homeless except with a blue box to sleep in. You left her to me because you wanted to stop as badly as me and you knew you would have given up travelling. First days where like a rush, never getting out of bed,trying to get used to stay at one place, earning Jacky's trust. Blimey, that was a tough piece of work. Are you aware of the fact that we are really not what parents wish for their daughter's to bring home as husband?" Both Doctor's had a good laugh remembering Jacky and her sudden outbursts of anger. "We where happy, _I_ was happy," Doctor Tyler said solemnly. "Had completely forgotten how _that _feels and I was a human, I was never alone. I was surrounded, crowded, encased by humans. Not the last of a kind." He paused and remained in his memories for a while. The Doctor smirked: "Does she still dress so indecent?" Doctory Tyler laughed out loud:" No, no longer, it actually turned out she has great taste given enough time and money to do the shopping, not rushing round like a psycho grabbing the first shirt you can get your hands on. Guess I've spent half of my human life waiting for her in front a changing cubicle circled by various bags."

"You never thought about growing the Tardis?" "Of course I did, first I wanted to give us rest, give her a rest, I said I'd want to let her stay around her family for a while. Rose thought is was her fault I didn't grew her but in fact I had gotten tired. I had been a thousand year old alien in a human body with Timelord mind and chasing Wheevils and saving only earth from alien invasions and working at Torchwood was more than enough." Doctor Tyler explained, he now really looked like a thousand year old, his shoulders had sunk and he constantly ruffled his hair, a desperate glance in his eyes.

"So what do you want to know? Cause you certainly did not just want to lose in memories." Doctor Tyler asked and looked gravely at his older self.

"Yes, no I did want to...well. I want to know who Rose is?" "Who she is? Think you should know that by now." He replied mockingly and earned a annoyed stare. "I don't know what she is, something entirely new I suppose. You scanned her the last time you met so you're not smarter than I am. And before you ask: I haven't gotten smarter on her with time moving on. She told me it had gotten something to do with her journey and a thing from my future she had discovered unintentionally. But she would never answer my questions. She only told me she did something she would one day pay for, she had killed someone but it wouldn't be a crime. She changed the future but if she'd shared it with me it would become a fixed point which had to be evaded at any cost. Honestly, whatever that was, it caused the only conflict between us we would ever go through. It drove me mad not to know, we had uncounted fights on that subject cause I wouldn't let loose. I told her I did not trust her any more and that I needed to know, said I'd regretted having told her my name and that I'd grew the Tardis and leave. Besides I started to believe that she wasn't Rose any more but someone else. Believe me when I say we can be very, very cruel and unjust.

I fact I did leave her, moved out and sulked in my hotel room. I behaved like an eight year old and I missed her and waisted weeks. I came home one night. She hadn't returned yet so I waited. When she finally turned up, she looked awful. Her skin was bruised and beaten, her right arm broken at several positions, her hair stared from dry blood. The look was horrifying. "What happened to you?" I asked. She looked completely expressionless at me: " A Tyrannoaurus had made it through the riff. Such a giant creature but bone dead stupid. Got almost killed before I could send it back home." She paused and kept staring at the floor. She did not even look for a second at me. "So you did grew her up, setting sails and leaving, aren't you? Found a way to make me forget your name first? If you didn't never mind, I wont give it away but you don't trust me any ways..." I could hear from her voice she was almost crying and very very tired and I couldn't reply a single word. "Gotten out of words Doctor? That's quite a premiere. You have never been good at farewells, remember what you said when I told you I love you? "Quite right" What's that for an answer? " she carried on getting louder and louder:

"You told me once what your promise means of being a Doctor. Shouldn't your promise be universal? Also valid towards me? I had been looking for you, searching for you and now you say you don't trust me? I kept looking for you all my life and you keep abandoning me, but I got it now. You regret having me told your name? What you really regret is this life, you are bored and bound to me and this planet. You treat humans like pets and now you're fed up with me and want to move on.

Go on then, leave! I'm not holding you back and I certainly won't harm you. Leave now and be a Timelord again because acting like a sulky human bloke, fed up from job and wife does not suit you. Turn to what you have been again, you are not some human, you are still a Timelord, move and remember who the hell you are but don't ever come back because I would not bear to loose you once more and to be left again. Leave me, but let it be the last time now!"

I still couldn't answer because she was right, I had treated her badly and I was ashamed I opened my mouth but she interrupted again: "You need to become a Timelord again and leave. It is coming, something is approaching from the dark and you are right, I am not a human any more. I have not been a human in a long time but neither are you. You always want to know where I have been and what I did on my way back from parallel world to parallel world. It is for your own sake I won't tell you. I must never tell you or the future will never be rewritten but please believe me that anything I ever did was for your good? "

She turned angry, furious, outrageous: "I walked a dozen universes only to safe you! And you keep CONSTANTLY leaving. Leave now, leave me and do it forver.

I looked at her, tears in my eyes:" Rose, I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry." "I know, you always are, the man who regrets all the time, regrets what he did, haunted. You won't be haunted, I promise." she replied saddened. "Can you at least tell me where you had been? Where in my future?"

It was the first time she would look at me all this time. But she did not look at me, she looked through me, her eyes had a glow, they shone golden and she muttered: " _My_ fate is already sealed, one time string is fixed...waisted time..."she shivered and I looked at her, could feel the power rushing through her, similar to a Timelord but so much more and different and she said one word: "Trenzalore".

She left me standing there and turned to the bathroom. When she returned her skin was flawless, not a single bruise left, the arm healed. I was baffled. "Not human" she commented drily. "Still here?" I finally realised my mistake, I should have never asked her. She must have noticed because she reassured me:"It is only my fate that has been sealed, your future is safe, I promise. I want you to be safe my Doctor, you must ever believe this, my promise. Please go now."

You know that we make excuses every day but not like that one I had to make at this occasion. I fell on my knees and begged her to come home with me. I did not grew the Tardis and I promised I would never take off in the Tardis without her. She accepted my apology and let me take her to Gavaign Castle, I had bought it for her to show her that I really meant it, staying on Earth. We never talked about it again, not even when we tricked the Torchwood scanners.

It is my fault, what happened was my fault. I waisted our time and let something slip into our world. She was able to see the future similarly like we do but I couldn't let go, I was so thick. "

Doctor Tyler had finally finished his story, he gasped and buried his face in his palms. The Doctor padded his back and bit his lip. He had at other pint hardly acted better and to his embarrassment he had not treated River at other opportunity likewise because she just did not mean that much to him and unlike Rose, she had started as a mystery, not ended as one.

The Tardis had finally reached the set coordinates, Horus System, except the Horus System was gone.


	14. Turn Left

Rose was a puppet on a string. She'd go to work, hunt down aliens, go home, take a nap and start all over. She'd never see him again and she kept only on with her life because he would wanted her to. Because he always saved the earth and she must live up to him.

Whatever she did, she would first ask herself what the Doctor would do, how he would do it and she gave her best. Since she was in charge of Torchwood, killing aliens was no more an option, an option was sending them back through the riff or withholding them in custody, killing was only allowed as last measure, in fact before you would get killed yourself.

The riff under the city was always active, opening random windows to different times and spaces sending through mostly dinosaurs and wheevils. The ones where from the past, the others from a future Rose feared to discover.

The wheevils where drop dead stupid, aggressive and scared what made them especially dangerous. The creatures never understood what threw them into that place and why, they soon had recognised that they where physically superior to humans but nevertheless did not stood a chance. A fact that even scared them more.

When Rose discovered that she could talk to them, reassure them and bring them quietly and safely back to their homes the Torchwood members gasped relief and Rose figured out that she still was somehow connected to the Tardis and as the Tardis was the fastest way to the Doctor she raised up her hopes to reunite again.

The wish for a reunion turned into a necessity when the dreams kicked in: Rose could see the Dalek's rising from their graves, she could see a giant spider and the Doctor loosing control and drowning in a flood he had set up to drown the monster. She could see the walls between the universes falling and planets turning into stones, forever falling through eternity. Planet earth moved to another place. She saw the stars going out one by one and the end of time itself, she saw the return of the Timelords who would get rid off their bodies become one great conscience.

The dreams repeated their-selves and soon they where no more part of her sleep but of her life. One moment she stood in the street, sun shining, people going to work, the next moment the street was turned and crowded with Daleks, the air filled with screams of "Exterminate".

Time itself was up in arms.

She knew that the riff would be her only chance. The riff was a gateway to another world and she convinced Pete to put up a niece amount of money to do research on the riff. At last she had what she wanted, a door to cross the universe to another one but the journey would be anything but safe or secure.

"We estimate you will have to cross twelve universes before you enter the one of your origin," head scientist Toshiko Sato explained. "You estimate?" Rose asked and frowned. "Might be thirteen as well or only eleven, we can't be sure. Such thing has never been done before, it's the only possibility to travel without ripping a hole in the fabric of reality." Rose nodded, she knew that, that's why she had suggested the idea and had been calculating the varieties with Tosh for the last six months.

Tosh looked anxious: "You are really sure you want to do this? Should...I think...maybe...what about...uhm...getting yourself tested by Owen? Maybe you need a little break, what if it's not apocalypse time yet?" she asked nervously, because suggesting your boss might be a psych could get definitely wrong if the boss would really be a psych. Rose had considered this possibility as well, that she maybe only could not cope with the loss of her Doctor. But she had experienced enough to be mature enough to not act like a love sick teenager.

A severe stare by Rose made Tosh shut up. "So how are my chances? I made a few calculations, I want to compare yours and mine." Tosh handed over a sheet, Rose glanced at it and smiled. "That looks reassuring, really good, better than mine." Tosh was stunned, dumbfounded: "There is a probability of 98,5% for you to die!" Rose smiled cheerfully: "I calculated 99,1%, what means chances are rising. Any any ways, that means nothing for me, for the individual case and it is not certain that I'm going to die."

"Boss, you are insane," Ianto Jones the smoking hot , welsh Torchwood secretary told her, he made a bow and served the tea. "As long as I'll be gone Gwen Cooper will be in charge," Rose commanded nodding at a thin green eyed woman in her thirties, "You will always follow the first order: keep anyone and anything alive. We protect, don't forget that."

Rose packed her stuff, she would only be able to take a back pack with her, wrote the farewells for her mother, Pete and Tony and waited for the Torchwood crew to be gone, they would have never let her execute that plan. She was alone. Alone like the Doctor.

She opened the energy supply and breathed in, she was about to jump into a door between two worlds: jump in there, walk the parallel world, find the riff, jump again. Find sufficient energy supplies on that planet, however it looked like. Do it again and again until she had found the Doctor, warned him and saved him. A billion options: the world could still be in the stone age, inhabited by dinosaurs or crowded with zombies. There where absolutely no boundaries. Rose tried to hold back her unleashed imagination - easy peasy.

When she had looked into the Vortex she had had no idea what was about to happen, how dangerous it was, how much it would hurt her. To say that she was afraid was the understatement of the century. Waiting would not help, she made an inrun. Ironically she yelled out "Geronimo" and jumped.

The various parallel Earths differed from each other either only slightly or where not to be recognised as Earth at all. The first one was not challenging, at least not for Rose, she had no trouble getting a proper energy supply thanks to her psychic paper and the fact that she was blonde: on this Earth the Nazi Party had won World War two and where still abusing their authority. She couldn't help herself but join the resistance and help triggering an upraise causing the fall of the Nazi's.

Earths number two, three, four,five,six,seven and eight resembled Pete's World, only slight differences, either more Socialists or Conservatives at power, nothing to worry about. With good and bad people in balance, technology a bit further or behind. She could move freely, wait for a riff to turn up and get ready to jump. Earth number nine made her shiver, humanity had extinct and she fought her way through the ruins of civilization. As far as she could snap from fading and rotten newspapers a virus had caused this misery. To her luck the disease had spread over six months ago and she didn't catch an infection. Hardest part to her was the wait on that rotten Earth: she did not want to spread the virus over the next universe and run several tests on her body before she finally jumped through the riff.

It was said so easily, as if it was nothing, jumping through the riff. Each time she did it, she nearly faced death. She would dash through the void, seeing every turn the Earth she was approaching had ever made, every single turn, every big or small decision, the good as well as the bad ones; for example on the first World the Americans fighting alongside the Germans, never getting rid of slavery. She would experience thousands of years in a moment, the whole birth of mankind up to the point she landed. But she would not only see but feel it. Feel the pain and the joy of every human ever born and ever died in a second. Each jump where thousands of years. Gladly, when she landed it was only like having had a terrible nightmare - in the first place. But at each jump it got worse, it got more real and the sensation of only having had a dream turned more and more into reality.

It was no wonder she had never again later talked about her journey, she felt as if she'd be a hundred thousand years old and indeed she was. When she landed, she needed more and more time to pull herself together, differ the history of mankind from her own time line and her life. She would lie on the ground for hours, trying to remember why she had started her journey and on which world and why she was getting on. She wanted to die, to curl up in a ball and never get up again. It was the Tardis key that helped her always to remember , hanging on a lace around her neck, whenever she touched it, it helped her setting her mind back.

She knew the journey was changing her, time and space would get a new meaning. Rose began to see time like a thing. Wherever she'd look, she'd see strings of time, would see the turns and curls and their dead ends. She knew now what a fixed point in time was and how it looked like: it was a stab, a sword in the heart of each universe and every wrong turn could cause such a sword. The wrong turn could only be made once, the other varieties where open, could differ, could rewrite time but one wrong turn and that was it. The only life string that was ever and would ever be invisible to her eyes was her own.

Rose did not notice because her body was to drained out and her mind was about to collapse but she did get stronger, the Vortex was calling to her and entwining with her mind. Her heart would hurt constantly, she first thought it was due to the pain she had to see but it was not only the pain; her heart was changing physically. Each jump caused her to connect tighter with the Vortex and Time.

Her heart would be crushed and rebuilt, pushed together and compressed until it was hard as a diamond, able to lead Time itself through her body. Her worn out mind did not recognise that she did no longer need an energy supply to open the doors between the universes and only a touch of her hand would make the gates of the universes flung wide open. She was a psychotic wrack when she dragged herself over the tenth world, only able to think that she had two jumps left before being back home. Humanity had never been spread over this planet, it was inhabited by gigantic arachnoids, sixteen feet long and 9 feet wide, poisonous and horrifying. The slightest scratch could have killed her immediately. The next riff was only 4000 feet ahead but billions of spiders where blocking any path. She could hear their thoughts when she set her feet an the planet. There was no time to get herself together, her instincts kicked in, there was only the next riff to be reached and she run, run for her life like never before. Jumping from each spider's back to another but her body betrayed her. She stumbled and fell. The ground was so soft, like a bed but soaked with poison. The blur of voices around her got louder and louder: "Kill, kill, eat,eat, feed,feed, prey, prey, kill,prey, feed, end, life, end, prey." It was unbearable. The spiders where surrounding her, circling her and she could hear them laugh, a mad laugh, filling the whole planet, her entire head, flooding her heart.

It had all been in vain. There was no way she would ever get up again from this soft ground, she so desperately needed sleep. Eternal sleep. She wished the spiders to finish her, end this journes.

She opened her eyes and saw the spiders backing off, their expression, their thoughts had entirely changed. The spiders where scared, anxious, horrified. She dragged herself up and went on, the spiders letting her pass. Her body was illuminated, sending out a golden light. Time and space had no meaning any more, anything happened at once, at any step this planet was born and died, the years rushing around her. She tossed herself through the riff and landed on the planet she had been born.

Her energy level dropped almost into nothingness, she lost her memory, she lost her powers. Her heart uncramped, was nearly turned back to flesh.

Rose passed out. She was unconscious, nothing would wake her.

At was a usual day for the members of Torchwood except for Captain Jack Harkness. He had not talked for days to anyone, he would not leave his office, he would not make promiscuous jokes he barricaded in paper work.

The Doctor had died. He had drowned saving the Earth. Finished at last by a giant spider. His emotions had betrayed him, had made him cross any border. At last he had been to alone, nobody had been at his side to stop him from going to far, from crossing the border. Jack could not believe it. Captain Harkness was sure that the stars would fade, the world would end. The world, the universe, they needed the Doctor and a world without him was to be lost. Torchwood didn't get it, they had no idea how important he was, not the slightest.

Toshiko Sato disturbed him abruptly: "Boss, you need to come down!" It was no use going anywhere, he thought. The world would end sooner or later without the Doctor. "Someone came through the riff!" Toshiko told him excitedly. "She is still breathing and I have no clue what she is, not human but neither alien, all results are off the scale!"

Jack shook his head, there was nothing that could trigger his curiosity right now: "Put her into a cell, secure her and give her medical supply, make sure whever she is she won't escape." If the world was bound the end he would at least delay it as long as he could.

Tosh strolled away, she wasn't made for conflicts, especially not with her boss. He barricaded again and waited the others to be gone. At three in the morning he made a walk through the hub and visited the cells as well.

He did not recognise her immediately, the truth needed a few minutes to kick into his overshadowed mind. He stared at her in utter disbelief, unable to acclaim the evidence before his eyes. He did not leave for a second afterwards. He would frantically check her medical state any second and waiting for her to wake up.

Captain Jack had not the slightest idea what she could do about the situation but he had gained back hope. He knew that she had been locked up in a parallel universe, he had no idea how she had came back but his hopes raised as her medical results started getting from life threatening to stable.

Rose woke the twelfth day and looked into the well known face of an old friend. She sobbed uncontrolled, throw her arms around his shoulders and hold onto him as if she was drowning. Jack needed hours to calm her down.

When Rose was able to frame a clear thought again it was only to horrify her again. She learned that the Doctor was indeed dead and she lost any hope. She had come too late.

She counted the worlds she had crossed, counted them and tried to focus. Her powers came slowly back to life, the life strings where visible again but not as clear as before. Rather an anticipation than clear sight.

"This world is not possible. A world without the Doctor is not possible."

"That's what I've said, but it's the truth." Captain Jack replied seriously.

The Doctor's death was already a fixed point, a sword in the heart of the world, a rather impressive, gigantic, enormous one.

Rose decided to bend time. She spent hours to focus on the strings of life at this planet.

Donna Noble.

Donna Noble was the most important woman in the universe.

Donna Noble had made a wrong turn.

Donna Noble must turn left.

Donna Noble's turn was not yet a fixed point.

Rose Tyler would make Donna Noble turn left.


	15. The Timelord

It is not allowed to look into the Untempered Schism of Gallifrey more than once in your life. It must never ever be done.

It hurts, hurts more than anything.

But he can't look away.

He kept on staring alone into the Untempered Schism and the truth was revealed to him:

_Everything dies._

_Everything ends._

The end would last for thousands of years. It would be painful. A war was coming. The greatest war of all and in it the universe would burn and billions would die.

It was a fixed point in time. Nothing could be done about it. No matter which side would win, the victory would cost the universe. The victory would last for not even a second before everything would be turned to dust.

It was a sword in the heart of this universe and any other.

Any time line lead to this final event, a burning centre of disaster, the apocalypse.

He stared at the death of everything and was unable to believe it. It could not happen, it was too...

He had no words to describe or to explain what this was but he knew he must prevent this, no matter how.

Years went on and he would sneak out and look into the Untempered Schism to see that the sword would still stab the universe's heart. _Forever. _

If he could only control time itself. Not only travel into the past or the future and change here and there a bit. If he could only bend time and space itself. Become the master of time itself.

He was not the man to control time nor did he know such a man, there was no such man. Neither on this planet or any other. Your mind would burn, your body would die and you could eventually tear the whole universe with you.

He knew that because he had broke the law and stared at his own time line, he had looked into his future, a particular part of his future where he had tried to bend time. It had not worked. Doing it himself was also no option.

But there was someone. A young woman. A _human. _He despised humans, they where just so feeble. Had such a short life span, their minds where so narrow, they could not even communicate telepathically.

Still she was the only option.

The girl was no part of his life line but of another Timelord. A Timelord he despised for his affection for humans and his strong believe that the other races would be equal to the Timelords and would as well deserve to share this universe. He believed that the Timelords should rather reign over all races - for their own sakes. But that decision was not up to him,that was rather something Rassilon could handle.

He saw the Doctor and this young human woman together, travelling, exploring the universe and becoming _lovers. _The Doctor would bring shame over this glorious race. Anger, rage and wrath burnt his mind.

Not only a human would be the key to save the universe, no, a Timelord would abase himself and connect with a human.

He cried from pain over this insufferableness.

He stared into the Doctor's future and saw him with this human. He had changed himself and had become a part human himself, had married her and there would be a child. He saw their child, this crime against nature. A quarter Timelord and looked away in despise.

But albeit this was _great_!

This was the solution to the universe's end! He would track this girl down and take her mind. He would kill her feeble, unworthy, disgusting human body and prevent this child from ever being born.

Over hundreds of years he searched for trustworthy loyal devotees. Devotees who would apply their whole lives to find the girl and to collect the only material in all of creation that could tie such a power down to ground. Hundreds died until he was finally ready, until he had his chain.

A chain from dying stars.

He chose his two most frenetic followers and set sails to another universe. It was certain he would die in this universe because once the wall to this universe was open he would have to close it with his Tardis and be trapped. But it was all worth it and in the end it was so easy.

The attack came unexpected, the Doctor was unprepared, the girl albeit at the brink of changing into a Goddess still only a human. Rose Tyler. Her name did not matter anyhow to him. Just her mind was extraordinary.

He had punished the Doctor, had taken what meant everything to him and impeded the birth of another disgusting half Timelord creature.

Gallifrey had now the ultimate weapon. Time had finally a mind. This mind would control time and keep it running. This mind could now be controlled by the Timelords. hold by chains and trapped in a wooden box besides as she was time itself she would not stop her own existence.

It was perfect, he was perfect.

He went to Rassilon and left with his two companions. In favour he was given the honour to chose his own name: The Life Bringer and the weapon he would lay into Rassilons hands would be called

The Moment.


	16. Trenzalore

Rose gasped. She had stumbled and fallen. The spider was above her. She could see the gigantic teeth and the venom dripping from them, awaiting it's prey.

She had only seconds left to live, the spider reared up and Rose looked into eight hungry eyes, she felt the fur, hard as iron, ripping her flesh. The spider stabbed it's poisonous fangs into her heart. The pain was overwhelming and she screamed out, her last thought before drifting into unconsciousness, the last word she murmured was "Doctor".

The world turned dark and silent. Finally she let go and let herself swap into an ocean of swirling stars and planets, drifting into death. It felt so good, so right, so needed. Everlasting sleep would be awaiting her and wonderful dreams of... the Doctor.

It caused Rose all her strength to open her eyes, to force her mind to the surface of reality. She focused on her heart and commanded it to keep going, keep bumping, she would not give up. Not now, she was so close.

Rose pushed herself up from the ground. The spiders where gone and she lay in a small pantheon from black marble. Solid and ice cold. Above her was a small window, showing the night sky. A starless, black sky. She looked around and found herself in a marble room: the walls where painted with awkwardly familiar scenery, one picture caught her eye more than the others: a young blonde woman next to a man in pinstripe suit in front of the scenery of New - New -New and so on York. She touched the picture and the little figurines came to life, stood up from a blanket, grabbed each other's hand and started running, laughing. She looked away and the picture became a picture again. It did not took her much longer to realize that every picture was a small event from her life with the Doctor, starting from their first meeting to their separation. The pictures where pin sharp, more accurate than any photography, giving any detail until her and the Doctor's last event on Doomsday, the day of their separation. From here on the pictures where blurred, diffuse...this was future, the varieties where still open.

She left the pantheon and stepped outside:

This place, this planet was entirely new. She sensed somehow that this planet was not another parallel earth. This was a planet wider away than any she had ever visited with the Doctor.

Her senses returned, she saw time running around her. This whole place was flooded with time, covering the planet and fading...

It was a gigantic graveyard, she passed the tombstones and read familiar and unfamiliar names. River Song, Sarah Jane Smith, Donna Noble, Amelia Pond. Rose passed the names of the people the Doctor ever loved or would love. Rose's hands where illuminated, she looked down upon her body and found herself dipped in golden light. When she looked at the tombstones she could see that they where empty, only a symbol-like her own. She was sure that her body would never find it's last rest here, all this was only made in dedication for the Doctor.

What definitely was no symbol but cruel reality was the Tardis on a far away hill. The spaceship had become huge, it's inner size turning to the outside. Her heart raced faster and as it did she could fell that her heart was no longer from flesh but hard and solid and every beat would throb gallingly against her flesh. She tried to ignore it and focus.

Voices could be heard in the distance and she was overwhelmed by the feeling of a massive paradox approaching. Rose started towards the biggest tomb on the planet, the Doctor's. The doors where open and she saw him lying on the floor, screaming from hurt, dying over and over again. His time line lay before her, rolling through all galaxies and all times and it was about to be changed, every victory was about to be turned into a loss, she could feel whole civilizations being erased, billions of deaths, she had never been aware how many the Doctor had ever saved.

Rose wanted to jump, wanted to enter his time line, search him, save him. As often as necessary but it was impossible. His time line was also her time line, they where connected and a change of her own time line was impossible. Far worse, the Doctor's time line was the time line of the whole universe. Any living being was in some kind connected with the Doctor. Directly or indirectly he had touched every being.

Nobody was left to change what was happening before her eyes, not without creating a massive paradox, as massive as the one happening in front of her eyes.

No living being was untouched.

Rose turned the thought in her head.

She stared at the strings of time, awkwardly knowing that she had time, enough time. What she was about to witness took place in the future, but it was no possibility. It was a fixed point in time that the Doctor would once be lead here; what was not fixed was the turn of the Doctor's life. What she saw was not meant to happen...

The terrible consequences of this event where so impossibly horrifying and yet it was impossible to stop it from happening, something impossible must happen to stop this. If there was only a being untouched by the Doctor's life, someone who was not supposed to exist, someone...she fell asleep from exhaustion, dived deeper into a version of the future.

Rose dreamed, dreamed of two people made for each other, two people that would spent their whole life together, be ever in love, the perfect couple. Rose saw the time strings of these two people and though they matched perfectly they would never meet, in no possible constellation. This was not a fixed point, it was just a strange coincidence, a matter of fact waiting to be fixed, corrected.

If these two people only met each other, if they only had a child. This child would be impossible, it would have never been meant to be. An impossible child.

Rose sighed from sadness, blew her breath and a leaf started it's way down to ground. She saw two people meeting each other. She knew they would have a child, a child being born on exact the same day she would meet the Doctor the first time, a child who would have never existed if she'd never met him, a child's whose existence was actually impossible.

"Welcome, Clara Oswin Oswal!"

Clara had never been meant to be, she was one too much, literally. Rose knew that she should not exist, it had not been planned and it upset the universe, disturbed it's balance; if there was now one life too much one had to die and Rose knew it would be her, the day Clara would first meet the Doctor Rose would have to die, would have to give up her physical existence.

It had costed her almost all her new found powers to create a new human, an impossible human, a human to save her Doctor but she smirked, she had outwitted time itself, had found a way to save the most important person in the universe.

She came back to life,still lying under the spider but she had lost her fear and got lazily back up.

Time to save the Doctor.


	17. A last mission

Commander Raxilious of the army of Raxacoricofallapatorius, glorious carrier of the sixth seal of the Slitheen hated the idea from the start; as a devoted servant to his race and military services he still kept his mouth shout.

The bloody war was about to begin all over again and he had a bleak foreboding that his actions would be known in history as the ones that would start it all again.

The Time War - up to him this dreadful thing should have better stayed where it was, in a neat timelock along with the entire Dalek army.

He did not trust the Daleks, did not believe them when they said the Slitheen would be left in peace after the war, rule the universe alongside them. The Daleks would kill us alike, he thought, he knew. Not even the Cybermen came along with them, despite all their similarities.

But right now the Daleks where their only option,their only hope. The Slitheen had overpopulated their home planet and their forces where weakened and the Daleks had offered them help with conquering a new world.

Yes, they needed help, needed to built up alliances but of all races had it to be the Daleks?

He looked with sorrow at what was being built up: the Cyperman where "recruiting" people, which meant constant upgrades, the Weeping Angels would no longer hide but assemble, the Daleks, only a handful wanted to set up an army again...

And the cracks...anywhere in the universe where these cracks. Nobody knew what they exactly where, wild rumours, theories and gossip floated around. He did not agree with that, he always had been a man of facts.

The newest rumour said it would be the Timelords returning from wherever they had been. He certainly did not like that possibility. He had heard about the Doctor and a whole bunch of such genius people with control over time and space was a unpleasant thought for sure.

But still, even if it where the Timelords again, was that an excuse for restarting a war that could possibly end the whole universe itself? All life? For all time? The whole thing had definitely none of his approval and yet he had been chosen for that mission...

Commander Raxilious sighed and left his home unsure whether he would ever lay his eyes again on the tarn he had once been born in. He never had had the habit of making a fuss over farewells and goodbyes but this time he revisited his dearest friends and family before he took off.

He would first meet a quite suspicious and saturnine man, known all over the galaxies as a trader of things that should better be left untouched called Salomon.

Said man had found a wooden box, a box desperately wanted by the Daleks. His order was to get that box and take it straightly to Skaro. The box was to be bought at any price and afterwards the Daleks would claim a little favour.

Daleks never claimed little favours, never ever. They never offered anything and got less back than they gave. The Commander felt his soon death.

The first part of his mission was easy, the trader gave him the box, wrapped up in several layers of clothing, blankets and other fabric. The whole thing was once again put into a box of a metal Commander Raxilious had never seen before in his life. Salomon had told him really, really seriously, alarmingly seriously not to open that box. In fact, the Commander was not even interested in the thing, he just wanted to get rid off it and travel home, hopefully alive and in one piece.

The next part was really frightening, facing the summoned Daleks on Skaro. He head heard the rumours of other races carrying a Dalek inside their bodies but seeing it with his own eyes, that was definitely another level and he became suspicious over that box. The thing must clearly be dangerous... could it be? No, that was a fairytale to frighten children!

The box got unwrapped in front of his eyes and the Commander gasped. All horrors became true at once, there was no doubt, he had never believed it would really exist but here it was:

A wooden box covered with Gallifreyan writing, Gallifreyan intarsia, Gallifreyan clockworks.

The Moment.

The Daleks could barely touch it, the box was vibrating, pulsating from energy. However stood too close would burn to ash.

A column was charged with the energy from the box, a spacecraft would be prepared for him and he was sent to a far away planet he had never heard of before, completely uninhabited, just a desert.

He considered to disobey but he was a man of honour, a man of principles and a man of the army, not a runaway coward.

Having arrived on the planet he witnessed the beginning of a true apocalypse:

the column tore heaven open, ripped a hole into the void and he gave in, hoping someone would stop what he had just started.


	18. Time is up

**Warning: a mild sexual scene is described at the end of this chapter**

_To my beloved husband,_

_my only love,_

_my Doctor,_

_My name is Rose Tyler and this is my last story in all time and space. I don't know exactly how much time I have got left, I assume this night and a day. My death is coming, it is very close now and I am afraid. _

_You are here with me; we are in Scotland in the parallel universe, enjoying all luxury and comfort a human life is able to offer. We had thirteen years and my time with you is coming to an end. This time it is me who is going to leave but believe me when I tell you it is for your own sake and even more._

_It is night and feel it approaching, we have a few hours left. Our home is secured the best way possible and I am planning to wait until you have fallen asleep. Afterwards I will welcome my murderer. My hope is that you will not have to witness my assassination but I'm not sure if I'll have my way. You will still have to be near me otherwise you would have to join me in death soon and I can't let you die, I will never allow it._

_I want you to be safe, my Doctor!_

_But to keep you safe I must hurt you and it's tearing me apart and I wish could tell you how sorry I am. So, so sorry but there is no other way, no other acceptable way._

_We had had our arguments over my journey, over the the things I did and saw and always refused to tell you. Before, I never used to keep secrets in front of you, my love. You never liked mysteries, you never wanted not to know something and though you left me alone to my secret, I can still see the question burning in your eyes._

_If you ever receive this letter, than my plan has worked and time is no longer disturbed, the time streams of your life are back where they belong, your victories have not been turned into losses and you have no new, disturbing memories of your life on your mind. _

_The universe is safe and so are you._

_What I did, I did without choice in the name of peace and sanity. But everything comes at a price,right? _

_During my journey to my universe I came to visit a place well known to you. I saw Trenzalore and what would happen to you: the Great Consciousness would break into your grave and give his life to enter your timestream in order to turn all your victories into losses. But your Time Stream is the time stream of any living being, there is nothing you have not touched, no one who does not owe his life in some way to you. As there was no living being untouched by you, no one was able to enter your time line and reset it._

_Something impossible had to be done to safe you, an impossible being had to be created and I found two time streams that would never find each other despite they would be a perfect match, a brilliant couple, just like us. That they would never find each other was no fixed point in time, it was a mere coincidence._

_I lead this two timestreams together and the couple gave birth to a child: Clara Oswin Oswald, the impossible girl, born to safe the Doctor, able to put the timestream back in place._

_This is the crime I committed, creating a human just to safe you and I feel guilty about it having abused her in that way._

_And now to the price I have to pay: I gave life, a life that was never meant to happen and I disturbed the universe. A ordinary human is the most important thing on the world. You surely remember the time you gave me that lesson? When I nearly ended the world by preventing my father's death? It's practically the same thing with Clara, her birth means another being's death and it comes to happen that my death will be demanded._

_I will die the very day Clara enters your timestream and it will not be a peaceful death or a death by accident or during one of our missions to protect the planet._

_My life has to be taken violently and on purpose. Someone will come and take my death by his own free will. This is absolutely essential. This person's will is going to be focussed on my death and so will the universe be kept in balance._

_I excuse that I can't send you away and die on my own. Still I want you to be safe and as I am no longer a human, my death will give you life and will turn you back into a Timelord. Whenever I ask you, you keep telling me that you are happy and love me and will always stay with me. You once desperately wished to be human but you are the Doctor, you will always be. You and me, we only borrowed a few years, we always knew that we would never get our fairytale ending._

_But that's not all: if I send you away you would die, killed by the same man coming for me and I can't let that happen. Believe me, I saw the future and I saw only these two options: either letting you die or turn you back into a Timelord._

_I know that this should not be my choice but how could I tell you or ask you? You know better than I that you are not allowed to see your future and even if you are now a human you still remain a regeneration of the man you will once become._

_Please don't ever blame yourself for my death, this is my choice and you could have never changed my mind upon this._

_I love you and I will keep you safe - forever._

_Rose Tyler _

Rose read her letter over and over again, she was trembling and anxious. She knew she was going to die and it frightened her, she didn't wish to die and yet her end was to come. Would she leave that letter to the Doctor?

She tore the paper into little pieces and tossed them into the fireplace knowing it would be better to explain nothing at all, knowing he would always blame himself, knowing there where no words to tell him all this in the right way as there was no right way.

Her murderer was approaching, she could feel it in the air, sense it and she desperately wished for another day and a last sunrise.

Finally she and the Doctor had settled to down to an almost ordinary life, chasing Wheevils, doing lots of paperwork, leading Torchwood and making scientific research.

The constant running had become a memory but life was nonetheless exiting. Rose could not have wished for more on her last day in life. The Doctor was in excellent mood, trying himself out on painting as it had been a while since he had last visited Boticelli.

She stood him model and had therefore hours to look at his face, to capture every wrinkle and the exact colour of his skin, any expression of his mouth and eyes.

She memorized the angle of any little hair upon his head and the way his arms and hands moved over the canvas.

As he was done with his painting she had taken him fully onto her mind just the way he was on their last day. It would be the only thing she would be allowed to take with her.

The picture had turned out to be a real piece of art, in fact Timelord art ,which meant he had captured a real piece of time and torn it up on canvas. Every detail had been made with the most of care and diligence, the picture coming out as a true confession of love.

Rose embraced him, knowing it would be the last time. She caressed his skin and kissed her way down from his hair to his legs and up again which made him chuckle. She caressed his ears and sucked them carefully making her way to his collarbone and to his nipples, pinching them playfully before she dedicated her attention to his centre.

She could feel his heart speeding up and his breath becoming heavy as his arousal grew; he was about to come any second. She stopped and he moaned disapprovingly. Her royal blue silk dress slid to the ground accompanied by her peach coloured lace bra and her matching slip. She gave him a deep kiss, exploring every inch of his mouth with her tongue. He rolled over and she could feel his weight upon her, between her.

Thirteen years and she could still drive him mad.

She lay in bed and he had just left their bed to head for the kitchen when the attack came.

Time was up and Rose Tyler had gone forever.


	19. The Spacestation

The Doctors and Clara had landed the Tardis and stared out suspiciously. "Did you prove our terrible driving skills again?" demanded Doctor Tyler derisively.

The Doctor gave him an annoyed stare: "Check the Tardis navigation system yourself, it's the right place except..." "Except we are somewhere else, looks like some sort of space station to me, it's like Star Wars." Clara ended the sentence excited.

The three time travellers where looking at a long hallway. White shiny walls left and right, shiny white floor, everything looked disquietingly sterile and abandoned and as if made of plastic. It was all silent, just a little humming could be heard. The sight did not even change after a walk of twenty minutes.

Doctor Tyler scanned the area with his sonic screwdriver: "No lifeforms near but here is somewhere a huge power supply, tons of energy are evaporated, more then needed to keep this place running." "What sort of energy?" The Doctor asked, now a bit alarmed. The screwdriver hummed again and Doctor Tyler frowned: "Pure time energy – but this, it's impossible."

The Doctor sighed: "I have seen similar things before, whatever you do, if you see a crack in the wall and a bright white light then run, just run, don't go near the light. Let yourself better get killed before you come anywhere close to this light. Did you two understand me? Keep away from light emitting cracks!"

"Why? What is in the cracks?" Clara demanded curiously and a bit terrified. "These cracks are like scars in the skin of the universe, if the light gets you you are wiped out of existence, it's like you have never lived and someone is using this energy which should really,really not be done." The Doctor explained.

"Well, then, stop wasting time, let's get this fixed." Doctor Tyler said with a huge grin that made him look slightly mad, he scanned the wall: "Ah, there we go! A weak spot! " and drove his shoulder zestful in the wall. "Oi, that hurts." he pointed out with an even madder grin and bumped once more into the fragile skin of the plastic walls until it gave in and he pulled out a set of cables and something which looked like a pocket PC to Clara.

"So, now we know where we are and this place looks like. Seems like we are at the furthest edge and Clara you where right: this is indeed a space station but it's planet size, I mean huge does not even cover it closely and still it produces much more energy than it needs. Brilliant place." Doctor Tyler's eyes shone brightly as he said this and he looked a bit too exaggerated for Clara's taste, though she was already used to the Doctor's outbursts of energy.

"Hmm...I don't like this, this sort of technology used here." The Doctor was now wearing his round glasses he had once gotten from Amy "this here...it's like a best of Cyberman and Dalek technology. Clara get back into the Tardis, right now, wait there and stay in the Tardis."

"I'm not going anywhere, Doctor! You really suppose me to wait in the car until daddy comes back to get me? I wont leave and what do you want to do any ways against Daleks and Cybermen teamed up?"

"I'm certainly not going to hand you over to them or let them get you so they can put pressure on me or force me into something and I wont argue any longer. Tardis! Right now! Go!" The Doctor was now shouting at Clara,an outrageous look upon his face and Clara turned on her heels, she looked hurt and upset but bit her lips.

The Doctors nodded at each other and headed further into the space station.

Clara walked slowly back, she felt disappointed and a bit useless. Of course the Doctor only tried to keep her safe but as nothing threatening had so far passed their way on this abandoned space station she thought he had treated her unfair. Hadn't she proven herself enough? How many times had she saved him? In how many lives? And now she was sent back to the Tardis like some little brat that got in the way or was about to cause trouble.

Suddenly the atmosphere changed, it was no longer silent and Clara heard a familiar but very unwelcome sound: the metallic steps of the Cybermen, the stomping was still far away but it was coming closer. She had no idea which direction the Doctors had taken and as everything on this ship looked same she decided to keep walking back to where she had left them as the way back would no certainly be blocked.

The light turned immediately as she turned, it flashed red and a shrieking alarm bell started followed by "intruder detected!" screams coming from speakers everywhere. Clara watched horrified how the walls of the space ship suddenly opened to give her a view to what was behind: Cybermen. Behind the walls hundreds of Cybermen where detached to a clamping system, one next to the other, coming slowly to life.

Clara decided that now would be the best time to start running really quickly. The stomping was now coming closer but she dared not to look back. The alarm bell shrieked again "The Doctor is detected" was to be heard. She prayed she would find him before the Cyberman when she noticed that she completely lost her way. After god knows how many turns left and right through endless hallways she only knew that she was somewhere.

"The walls can slip open, there must be doors behind, something has to be here to orientate." Clara murmured and caressed a white wall with her bare hands to check for a button, a door, anything hoping not to find another Cyberman.

Clara was too distracted to hear the whoosing, hoovering sound a flying Dalek would produce. She turned and stared at three Daleks, hoovering a few inches over the floor the first shrieked "intruder detected! Followed by the second "exterminate!" Clara threw herself to the floor and jumped back up. Her knees where bleeding and she had bitten herself so hard in the tongue she could taste blood but she didn't care, just ran. The heel of her shoe got lose and she kicked both shoes away before she would stumble and fall.

Right in front of her Clara could detect three Cybermen who had just gotten loose from their docking station, she ran past them and could feel the cold metal arms reaching for her followed by the painfully slow sounding stamps of the metal feet. She was crying now, her eyes burnt from the tears. The Doctors had left her, assuming she would be safe but now, followed by Cybermen and Daleks she had little hope to see another day.

Clara came to a dead end, with her back against a wall and nowhere to run, no left or right, she could only watch the Cybermen and the Daleks approaching. "Intruders must be neutralised!" "Exterminate!" She closed her eyes and awaited her end as suddenly the wall behind her opened and closed again. Stumbling backwards into darkness her feet gave in and she landed on something soft. It felt like a smooth fur but under the fur there was something hard. She felt around unable to see anything in this pitch black darkness. Her skin got cut by this awkward something under the fur when she realized two yellow, shining, piercing eyes. Eyes glowing like fire, it hurt staring into them but she was unable to look away. She felt hypnotized and overwhelmed by pain. Her whole body shivered from these yellow eyes that burnt like a sun in her mind. Suddenly the Cybermen and the Daleks did not seem to be as frightening any more and she collapsed from the pain.

_**Please leave a review precious reader!**_


	20. A lovely encounter

Meanwhile the Doctors had split up to discover their surroundings. The eleventh Doctor gave a relieved sigh, knowing Clara was safe in the Tardis and the emergency protocol would take her back home whatever would happen to him here.

He was so old now he did not even remember how old he was. Maybe this was it? Maybe at the end of his life he had been rewarded by knowing that after all he was not the killer of his own kind but had saved them and somewhere in a parallel universe the Timelords where still there, waiting to enter this world that meant everything to him again. Maybe he was walking into his death, clearing the stage for others to come.

A parallel world, a bubble, a way to keep safe what is the most precious to you. A treasure vault. He had put Rose in such a treasure vault. The idea of her death, dying because of him and his life had threatened him so much he had rather left her on this godforsaken beach. Bad Wolf Bay and yet he had failed. He had only bought her time, thirteen years, followed by a sudden and violent death by one of his own kind. She was supposed to be safe there, she was meant to be. All the goodbyes just to prove the prophecies among her death to be wrong but he had _failed_. Her destiny had found her any ways.

Could he have prevented this? His Timelord self? He, with all his powers over time and space and yet his own destiny seemed to lead him only to the losses of his beloved ones. This had not been meant to happen and despite all the pain over her death there was also something else: jealousy and regret: if he could have never evaded her death he might as well had the remaining time spent with her. With his pink and yellow princess, with his biggest love, with the woman he missed every day since he had left her in the first place and in the second place.

Some days he could slap himself; how often do you get a second chance to be with the one that really matters? He got this chance two times and screwed up and now he was chasing a ghost that was maybe Rose or not along with a mentally damaged self, a dangerous thing, really and now even a complete Timelord. What would it had done to him? Losing her after thirteen years? Years that according to his other self, who was no other person than him, had been the best of his whole existence?

He could be so dangerous, so threatening in his rage. The Family of Blood had tasted from the fury of a Timelord and they where still being punished, the child with the red balloon was still visible in any mirror in any time and space, the boy still eternally watching the fields of England. He just could't bring himself to release them. The darkness was a part of him, ever was and would be and he fought every day to keep this side under control. It would be a lot easier to let go once in a while he thought grimly.

The Doctor had been drowned in his own thoughts and as there was no one standing next to him he had to protect he had been inattentive. The alarm bells shook him up and with terror he heard "The Doctor is detected" and something new and perhaps even more terrifying than his detection: "The beast has escaped!" shrieked the well known voices of the Daleks through any speaker aboard.

He smirked, he could at least bemuse the Daleks for a while as he was not the only Doctor on this space station.

Doctor Tyler had headed meanwhile downwards, curious to discover the stomach of the ship and he did not suffer a let down: he found the prison cells. They where all empty except for one which hold a familiar face. First he did not recognise the man. His face was bruised, his clothes torn but after a second look he was sure he had found the Timelord who had burnt his home. Doctor Tyler stepped forward, not quite believing his eyes and suddenly highly aroused:

"What a lovely encounter. Never mind the circumstances. Well, well. I did not expect to see you again so soon. Let's be honest,the way you entered my life was really not the best way to settle up a proper friendship." It seemed as if the Doctor would be beaming at the prisoner, chuckling, but his eyes where bleak and ice cold. The antagonism on his face petrified the Timelord.

"Who are you? Do I know you? Are your from my future?"

"Ah, I don't think so, come have a closer look."

The man had hardly enough power to rise from the floor, it lasted at least three minutes until he had crawled over the floor to the bars. The Doctor could feel bottomless hatred rushing over him and a big lust for revenge. This Timelord looked like an insect, a dirty cockroach waiting to be stumped into the floor. The collapsed, he whimpered from pain and gasped.

"Please let me out of here."

"Brilliant idea" The Doctor was bouncing in his heels as he said this and giving the prisoner a wide grin "We could have sooo much fun" he added and his voice dropped down a few octaves, it sounded threatening and than he turned to his excited voice: "Did the nasty people hurt you?"

The Timelord swallowed: "You are the Doctor, you help, always. It is your duty, your destiny to safe people. Daleks will come any minute, they will take me." his voice was nothing more than a hush filled with terror.

The Doctor beamed "You don't really expect me to do so, do you? But first things first: how did you end up here? I mean this place fits you and all, it's just the accommodation I love to see on you but I'm a curious man"

"I made a mistake, I took that human who could control time and tied her but I couldn't control her, nobody could. Escaping the parallel world was not so complicated, it went wrong two times, my devotees died but the third jump was a success but I got caught by the Daleks, they are desperately trying to find the Moment. Please, I can explain later exactly."

"Oh, I'm so,so sorry your friends died" the Doctor said with a huge grin "hope it was a painful and slow death by the way"

" Doctor, I will be exterminated, please. Please save me."

"You don't even know her _name_!" The Doctor yelled back at him.

The Doctor came close to the bars and his voice became really soft and silent, totally calm: "No" he whispered. "I won't save you."

The man shouted out: "But Doctor! You made a promise, your name is a promise, I know that!"

The Doctor smirked and whispered: "You'd better stick with the Daleks, they'll show you so much more mercy than I would. If you fear the Daleks than be petrified by me because I have so many ideas what I could do to you. Do you know the Family of Blood? No? Too bad. I could make you immortal, really immortal and see you suffer over and over again. Take that as my promise!" His face turned completely solemn, the grin faded: "I. DESPISE. YOU."

He jumped up looking bright and grinning again as usually: "Nighty night!"

Suddenly the Doctor froze, his whole body stiffened. Someone had sneaked up from behind and had embraced him. He could feel soft, loving arms tied around his waist, silky hair against his collar and lips on his right cheek.

He closed his eyes, hoping the moment would never fade. A scent of vanilla and coconuts teased his nose and under the perfume he could smell _her_.

He opened his mouth and tried to speak but all he could do was gasp. Something inside him broke, he was about to disappoint his Rose, do something he would never do around her, he would have never showed her this side of him. The blood inside him boiled.

The Doctor turned around and saw her, his Rose. She smiled at him, her brightest, loveliest smile and vanishing he could hear her: "Find me, I'm close"

Grim faced and still hating the man behind the bars he turned and fiddled with his sonic screwdriver until the cell was open. The Doctor did not look back or offered more help and walked on,knowing he must reach the core of the ship, the energy supply itself.

When he stepped out of the imprisonment wing he was welcomed by a Cyberman. Before he could react he was knocked out, the world went black and he prayed to be dead.

**Love the story? Hate it? Bored to death? Please leave a review precious reader!**


	21. The favour

Clara woke up. To her amazement she was not only not dead, no she felt great. The bruises on her knees where gone. She lifted her head a bit and saw her shoes next to her. The heel was back on, as if she had never lost it. The doors of the little closet she had run in where open, turning to the hallway she saw the Daleks and the Cybermen.

They lay on the ground. Shattered. Each of the aliens where torn to little pieces, metal, jaws, arms, heads where crumbled upon the floor. Clara got on her feet to look out for the reason of her salvation. "Doctor?" She asked in a low voice and put her shoes back on. She peaked around the corner and saw more Daleks and Cybermen but they where stagnant, frozen in movement. One was hovering over the ground, a Cyberman reached towards her. None of them gave a sound.

Something snarled. Clara had goosebumps, awaiting the worst she turned on her heels to the direction of the deep growls. Panic stroke her. She jumped back and fell over the torn out arm of a Cyberman. Before she touched the ground she got pulled forward. Something pushed her up, kept her in place until she regained her balance.

On the other side of the hallway sat the most terrifying creature Clara had ever encountered. The beast was beautiful though. The thing sat on his hindpaws, it's body was covered with bright white fur, it looked soft, smooth, shiny. Clara thought it must be a gorgeous feeling to stroke it. It had around 10 feet in height and it had teeth. No not teeth, fangs. Sharp gigantic teeth. The thing had just torn all these aliens around her into little bits. And the claws, like four swords on each paw.

Clara turned back to the face of that creature. It resembled somehow a giant wolf.

The beast growled and gritted it's teeth: "Don't look into my eyes. You would be lost forever."

Clara looked quickly on the ground.

The beast had a deep and loud voice, it wasn't shouting but it felt as if the whole space would echo it's words: "Clara Oswin Oswald. The impossible girl. I'm honoured to meet you."

Clara was to petrified to respond, she shivered from fear but she tried. She cleared her throat bravely but she was unable to say a word.

The giant wolf rose to it's full height and started coming closer: "Do you fear me? I did not do you any harm. See, I brought your shoes." The beast tried it's best to sound reassuring and soft but it's voice was unearthly. It filled everything, Clare felt as if the voice was a whole world, she drowned in that voice, it paralysed her.

But she pulled herself together and answered finally: "Yes, I do fear you." Her voice was so silent she could barely hear herself.

"Don't fear me. I have waited so long for you. Look at you. Brilliant, brave,precious, impossible Clara. I owe you so much and I am so sorry for what I'll do to you." The beast stopped and closed it's eyes. Clara breathed heavily, eyes wide.

"Sorry, not for what I'll do to you. I did already, you are here, as you."

"I don't understand." Clara replied shyly. "What are you? Who are you?"

The wolf looked down at Clara: "You don't remember, of course. I am the wolf, the big bad wolf of time. I came to you in your dreams."

Clara gasped: "You are the Moment, Rose Tyler."

The wolf lay his head to the side and snarled: "Such a long time ago, I remember the name."

The features of the beast began to fade and turned until it was gone. A young woman stood before Clara. Instead of gritted teeth she showed a bright smile, her perfect teeth seemed to beam, soft blond hair fell in curls over her shoulders and her pink dress. She was wrapped in a dress from heavy silk, decorated with golden flowers, it showed her shoulders, tight around her waist with a wide skirt. Like a mixture from the fifties and the baroque age.

Her hair was brighter than Clara could have ever imagined hair to be, as if it was enlightened from the inside, the skin almost as white as ivory and her eyes...nothing about her seemed to be real or earthly.

"Don't look into my eyes." She said and Clara felt as if the ground would open and she would be falling. "I'm sorry my voice makes you feel uncomfortable, I try my very best to hide my powers from you but it is so exhausting. I might mix things up again."

Rose stepped closer, keeping her eyes down: "Clara, I am so happy that we finally meet and I am so sorry for what I did. I always wanted to tell you. You saved my Doctor."

"What did you do to me?"

"I made you, impossible girl. You where never meant to be born before I blew a leaf from a tree."

"You did what?"

"I forced your parents to meet each other, I knew they would be so happy together but they where never meant to meet, it was not a fixed point in time, just a coincidence but still impossible before I stepped up."

"What does that mean?"

"It means you would have never been born but I needed you. I needed an impossible person. I did not do it for your own sake but to save the Doctor, that was my crime for which I have to pay. I came to you, gave you the Doctor's phone number and guided you into his life and to Trenzalore where you entered his time line. Nobody but you could have done it. I guess I just wanted to thank you."

"So it was all you. Does it mean my life is a lie? I don't exist at all?" Clara's voice trembled, she could feel hot tears in her eyes.

"No, of course not and I can't force you to do anything. Everything you did so far has been your own choice but I forced him upon you. I knew you would save my Doctor over and over again and I knew it because I see everything. Everything that was and is or ever will be and I used this ability and pushed you into my Doctor's life. I wanted you to know, I does not make up for what you have been through in all your lives."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you deserve the answer and you want to know why you have those dreams about me and me in the store, giving you his number. You always wanted to know."

Clara nodded silently, she could finally remember her: "But if it was all my choice why do you apologise? I wanted to safe him, always, he does all the time so much for the universe. How could I not protect him? And you, you where always there, weren't you? Guiding me."

Rose beamed at her and turned suddenly sad: "Yes I have always been with you, showing you where to find him. But it is not over yet. You will be with the Doctor for longer and I have to ask for one more favour:

You will return to Trenzalore and he will fall. All hope will be lost and darkness will embrace this world. Just right before the end you will regain hope and it will shatter a second after. At this point you will have to call me. Call my name, any name you chose and I will come. Will you do this for me, my impossible Clara?"

"Only that?"

"Only that. I can't force you to stay with him, to give him company and stand these dangers."

"The Doctor is the best thing that ever happened to me, how could I return to normal life." Clara had finally regained her strength, she wasn't trembling any more but sure of herself.

Rose lightened up: "I used to say that. Thank you my Clara."

"What about this place here? The Daleks, the Cybermen. Why did you lead us here?"

"I need you to release me, Clara. I'm not the Moment, I'm every moment in time and space. All time and space. The chains keep me torn to the box, they can wake me for a second. I can't be controlled but I can be dragged into present and it's dangerous. Whenever I'm pushed into present the future and the past cease, they stop to exist and it threatens all of reality. The Daleks believe that the Doctor could control me, he has my heart and they want his heart. They got the Timelord who killed me but neither they nor him understand what they did when they created me.

The Daleks just don't understand that they would cease to exist alike. I saw the future, if I hadn't called the Doctor now they would have torn this universe and the universe we used to live apart. I can feel his presence, I'm pushed into now. Look at the creatures, they are frozen. Everything is frozen and it will stay like this if he does not release me and sends my mind into the void where I belong. We would be trapped here forever, until we cease as well. Now is the only time to set things right and I needed you and your Doctor to get the other Doctor out of the parallel world."

Clara nodded: "So, how do we do it?"

"I'll keep time frozen for another minute, head forward to the stomach of this ship. The Doctor's have booth been caught by the Cybermen. Nothing can harm you, I promise but don't waste time, hurry up before reality is in danger."

Rose vanished but as promised the Daleks and the Cybermen remained frozen and somehow Clara just knew exactly where to run.

**Your turn precious reader: please leave a review!**


	22. The Name of the Doctor

The Cybermen had taken both Doctors and dragged them violently towards the centre of the spaceship; their wrists had been tied up and the aliens pulled them mercilessly behind them. The hallways seemed to be endlessly, ever staying white and sterile. Doctor Tyler lost his consciousness from time to time as had been hit hard.

Whenever he came to life he saw the other Timelord behind him and it satisfied him to see the pain and the fear in his eyes. He could not help it but he cordially hoped to see the other man die or being upgraded before his own faith would be sealed.

The eleventh Doctor acted differently, he yelled and shouted out loud, furious, petrified. He stomped his feet on the ground, struggled, denied to move on but it was hopeless.

Accompanied by Cybermen and Daleks he got thrown into the great dome hall of the ship. The floors and walls here where black, above their heads the endless space showed it's greatness. Inside was no kind of furniture, no columns, just a space as big as three pitches. At least a niece last view, he thought grimly.

From the left side Doctor Tyler got dragged in and was thrown on the floor. The Cyberman behind him pulled up the shivering Timelord: "Identify the Doctor." He said with his emotionless, dead voice.

Before he could answer the eleventh Doctor heard a surprised shriek and in came Clara, her hands above her head, followed by a Dalek. He swallowed, he had expected her to be safe back in the Tardis. To his great astonishment she did not look frightened at all, rather relaxed and she had even a smile among her lips.

"Clara!" he yelled out, "I told you to return." "It's all right Doctor," she replied, "we are fine." How the hell could she say that? And smile? The Doctor was truly confused, the situation seemed to be completely out of control.

The lights went suddenly on and the centre of the room became visible though it stayed gloomy: there was it, the wooden box, decorated with Gallyfreyan writing, covered with clockwork, just the way he had left it in the garden shed and it was burning. He could feel the energy evaporated by the box, much stronger than he could remember it.

The Cyberman pushed him towards the box as well as Doctor Tyler. Next to the box was a human woman, she had obviously a Dalek inside her.

"Nice to meet you again, Daleks. I've always wondered when you and the Cybermen would become best pals." the Doctor started.

"Silence Doctor! Your talking is not necessary as well as your wit. The Cyberman technology will help us control you and you will control this here for us." The Dalek woman pointed at the box and turned to the Timelord on the floor:

"Which of these Doctors is the true Lord of Time? Which of them has the heart to control the Moment and tame time itself?"

The Timelord pointed at Doctor Tyler and whimpered, begged for mercy. "Exterminate him!" Said the woman carelessly. Doctor Tyler smirked pleased but the Eleventh shouted out: "How do you know he does not lie?"

"Exterminate," she repeated, "It really does not matter at all, if he is not the one, we have another try."

Doctor Tyler got pulled on his heels and the Cybermen implanted the upgrade. He yelled out in pain but became silent a second after, it looked as if he was wearing a blue tooth headset.

"Obey me! Open the moment." said the woman. Doctor Tyler looked at her, expression blank: "Yes." He started walking like a robot, stiff and as he was operated by remote control.

The Doctor struggled in horror: "Fight it, you are stronger than that. I know it, they tried to control me as well. Fight it!" But Doctor Tyler kept on walking and Clara looked still completely relaxed, maybe she was too shocked?

Doctor Tyler kneeled down in front of the box and began to turn the clockworks mechanically, he knew exactly what to do. As he had set the last modulation the box opened up. One could feel the excitement and the anticipation in the room but nothing happened. The box was opened but it was empty, the room stayed silent.

The Dalek woman was truly confused as well as the Doctor. She turned to Doctor Tyler: " Doctor! Command the moment to show itself!" "Show yourself." he said mechanically.

Still nothing happened. The Dalek woman was furious: "What is that! The prophecy was clear, it said the Doctor would be the true Lord of Time, the one to control time and space. He must be the wrong one! Exterminate him! Bring the other one! Free the eternal Time Goddess!"

One Dalek just wanted to take aim as they all heard someone laugh. It seemed weird in this situation, the laugh filled the room, enlightened it, it filled the Doctors hearts and reminded him of apple grass and a sundown on a far away planet in a different time.

"Don't dare to touch my Doctor!" said a loud voice, hearing this voice was magnificent and painful at the same time, it was old as the universe and so young at the same time, it sent shivers down his spine and nearly brought him to his knees.

Clara had collapsed from the voice, she lay unconscious on the floor but she was going to be all right, the Doctor somehow just knew it.

Doctor Tyler blinked and the headset fell to floor, he turned around, looking out for where the voice came from but it was anywhere.

"Stupid Daleks!", she laughed, "you got it wrong again, there is no such thing as a Lord of Time. Still not one step closer to his true name," she added mockingly.

Suddenly the room was silent again before it was totally enlightened: "Time to give us some privacy, Daleks. I need to talk to the Doctor."

The Daleks and the Cybermen fell to the ground, just blacked out and Rose appeared next to the box.

She burnt like the sun and smiled her famous tongue between teeth smile: "Thank you for picking me up, Doctors."

Doctor Tyler was awestruck but not for long, he turned and started running towards her but he was stopped before he could reach out and embrace her.

"Don't come closer, my love. I would burn you. Don't touch me and don't look into my eyes."

"Rose." the Eleventh gasped approaching "It's really you. How?"

She beamed at him: "It's a long story and I can't stay long enough to explain it. I am entirely dragged into present by him, he has my heart. If I stay too long the future and the past would cease and we'd be stuck here forever, the universe would die."

"Why?" Doctor Tyler managed to spit out.

"Because of you, my love. I needed to be dragged into the present, needed to set things right. Return to you what was lost and protect your future." she beamed.

"It was you then, you gave me Gallifrey back."

She nodded silently: "How could I not? It ate your soul, hurt you so much that you had sent your people to death. I'm just sorry you where unable to remember what really happened earlier. I thought you would, it slipped out of your mouth sometimes, when you referred to Gallifrey as time locked. I couldn't mess my own time line up, you had to meet me; otherwise I would have never become time, it was vital." Her face was sad, she had tears in her eyes and her expressions showed pure, unspoiled love. She was looking at both Doctors at the same time, talking to them equivalently.

"Why did you gave me your heart? If they can't control you, what is the point? I don't understand what's happening here...I" Doctor Tyler asked, he looked exhausted but happy and added: "Forget it, it doesn't matter. I suppose we can go home then?"

"I gave you my heart to keep you safe, the Timelords would have killed you if you had been a human but it weakens me. Though this heart... it pushes me into present. You would always push me into present my love but not like this, it's so entirely right now time does not exist at all, just this moment here. The universe has stopped."

"Rose...what shall we do?" the Eleventh asked. "Release me. I did what I wanted to do. I gave you Gallifrey back and sent Clara, played a bit with time and space and adjusted your fate slightly for the better. It was not possible to prevent you from pain but at least...believe me, I did everything possible for you. But some points in time are fixed. A change would end all time." her face pleaded for understanding. "Will you believe me when I say I would always to the best for you? Wanted you to be safe?"

"This...Rose what are you?" The Doctors asked in unison. She frowned: "Well, I'm Time itself, this moment, every moment that ever was or will be. I protect time, take care of the strings of time and adjust them to prevent us from falling into nothingness. I'm the thinking mind of time." She paused and added: "And I love you, that's why I let myself tie to the box. It was the only way to act myself, I can't change things unless I'm pushed into action." She shrugged.

"I thought I would never see you again, I thought you would be safe, Rose..."the Eleventh's voice broke.

"It's all right, I died but anything dies. But it's vital to keep time running." Rose turned to Doctor Tyler: "Would you release me please? Just adjust the last clockwork."

"What happens then?"

"I'm free, my mind will be pulled into the void and time goes on. You'll have to run to the Tardis immediately as I'm the only energy supply on this space station. The Time War will return to you but not now. You'll return to Trenzalore once more but you'll be alright. I promise."

"No. No. NO! I won't let this happen. I'm not going to Trenzalore, I'm not interested in a war I want to go home." Doctor Tyler broke out, crying.

"You will. Gallifrey is waiting, you'll find it."

"Not Gallifrey! HOME! That is where you are. I want YOU!"

Doctor Tyler had a complete breakdown, the Eleventh cried silently: "You die then, entirely."

"But I died so long ago. The moment I looked into the Time Vortex I died, you just did not notice. This was supposed to happen just the way it is."

"I left you, I know it and it was wrong. Left you on a beach, left you from fury – but please. Don't leave me now, there has to be another way!" Doctor Tyler cried out, "You're a Goddess...just...don't go."

The Eleventh cleared his throat: "There is no other way."

"What will I become? When you're gone?" Doctor Tyler demanded, "Cause I can feel myself change, I can feel the bitterness, the hatred. This exterminated Timelord over there, he killed you! I would have enjoyed his suffering, I want revenge. I fell good about his death.I want you, take me with you! You make me better!"

Rose shook her head: "It's impossible. You'd die, you could never return."

"I wont free you!"

"You don't understand. If you stay with me you can never return to the universe, you would be with me eternally which means until the end of time; in a dream world I'd create for you. There is no way back. It would be a prison and you will never be able to change this decision."

"Rose...in your heart, there is only me. What is in mine? Look!"

"You can't really want this, my love. I suffer. I see all universes being born and die over and over and I'm responsible for the sake of all universes."

"Then let me help you!"

"But you can't help. It would destroy your mind you. I can take you along but you'd be trapped in an eternal dream."

"I would be with you."

Rose looked at the Eleventh, in search for help: "He is not with me either, you can have a life of your own again, please."

"Rose. I regret it, every day, I want you back so hard it hurts. Each day. I don't feel a bit differently than him. I did never tell you something and I want to say: Rose Tyler, Moment, Bad Wolf I..."

"Stop it. I know. I always know but what do you want me to do? All this power but I'm not God or a fairy..."Rose looked desperate, her face was in pain, she could bear all time and space but seeing her Doctor defeated almost tore her walls down.

"Take him with you, I can carry on but he had too much time with you. He is about to became the Valeyard, you feel it too. It's our fate to be separated from each other ever and ever again." The Eleventh answered silently.

Rose looked at him and shut her eyes: "It is not right."

"But we would be together? You and me, that would be real even when the world around is just a dream, right?" Doctor Tyler said pleadingly.

He stepped closer: "Remember my name, my _real_ name."

"The groom of time." She whispered.

He stepped closer and adjusted the last clockwork on the box of the moment. She was free.

"Rose, will I ever see you again?" asked the Eleventh under tears.

"No, you won't but I want you be safe. I will guard you – forever."

"Will it hurt?" Doctor Tyler asked her. "I would never hurt you." Rose answered with a sad smile and embraced him in a kiss.

The shapes of the two melted together as the room seemed to explode in golden light and she was gone.

The Eleventh grabbed Clara in his arms and just wanted to start running into the Tardis when she appeared in front of his eyes.

He carried Clara's unconscious body inside and took off, staring back he saw the space station fall apart.


	23. Epilogue

Clara was back on Trenzaore in a town called Christmas. She knew it would be the last time on this godforsaken planet.

Her Doctor, he was so very very old now, so broken and so brave. He was going to die and there was no hope left.

The Time War was about to start again and yet he was so stubborn, so selfless. He would not gain help from the Timelords, he would not tell his name. Not to save himself, not for his own life.

He had left her, had left her to face his faith, to shout a last time at the Daleks, mock them and die. She had never been so desperate before, she was safe now. He had told her, her safety would be his last victory.

Clara cried, she was shouting and screaming at the crack in the wall, begging the Timelords who reached out for this universe for help. Nothing happened. This was the end. The Doctor would fall. He would die, his story was told. She could not believe it.

"Rose! Moment! Bad Wolf! Help me! Help the Doctor! Please! It is time, all hope is lost! Please!" Clara whispered under tears.

She turned around and found a rose on the floor as she touched it, it fell to dust.

- END -

_To anyone who posted a review, read, liked or favourited this story: Thank you! This has been my first Fanfiction and I had a lot fun writing it. I excuse for any grammar or spelling mistakes I made, English is not my mother tongue and unfortunately I have no possibilities to practice this language._

_I always thought that the love between the Doctor and Rose was one of the most beautiful love stories...with the most heart breaking and dissatisfying end ever. _

_This story here fits into the canon, I gave my best to change nothing about the Doctor Who history (only exception: Rose does not use a dimension canon here)._

_Please leave a review my precious reader! Your opinion means a lot to me!_

_Thank you for reading my story!_

_Happy New Year to all Whovians!_


End file.
